I lived abroad for a while and I still remember some latinos that were weird about race and big into whiteness and it was always just so funny to me when they were talking to me like "us white people"

Theres a term for that kind of people in LatAm, the so-called Morenazis/Nazipardos. (Morenazi (portmanteau from Spanish moreno—meaning "having tanned or dark skin"—and Nazi) or morenario are derogatory terms to describe non-white people, or more directly mixed race, black, or even Europeans who are not considered fully white by WASP culture or neo-Nazis, who show support or sympathy for Nazism, Nazi Germany, the personality cult of Adolf Hitler and more directly white supremacism).

Spanish and portuguese similar to the dutch?? ALL THE FRENCH? EVEN THE SOUTHERN ONES???

I mean a Portuguese person born in Madeira is not at all like a Portuguese person born in Lisbon, or a Spanish born in Madrid and one born in Southern Spain. As for the Spanish and Portuguese being like the Dutch, is more or less that most people sees them as European, and they think all Europeans, except for the Turks, are White (in LatAm, for some decades most Syrians, Lebanese, Palestianians, Turks, Kurds and even some Egyptians were consider White as long as they were Christian and were willing to integrate with Latin American Society, though some Muslims and Jews were also accepted because they were seen as "conservative").

The idea of building your understanding of social relations on some sort of ideal of Europe while the very same europeans would not include you in the club you're busy maintaining is just darkly comedic.

It is a bit funny, they want to be part of the "West" but they will never be accepted. Some of them say they wish they were a colony of the US, and that they think if they hate their fellow latinos, that might get them respect with the Americans or Europeans.