this post was submitted on 23 Jan 2026
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askchapo

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What's socially helped you have less arrested development? The level of lonliness it took for me to try to stop someone from becoming a Nazi(so I could have them as a shitty friend) was so sad. (hexbear.net)
submitted 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago) by HexaSnoot@hexbear.net to c/askchapo@hexbear.net
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I'm learning that trying to turn a bully into a friend is such grade school shit. It arrests your development, and I want to know about the ways it does. I'm embarrassed I wasted my time thinking of how to talk to liberals who seem set on being right wingers.

I realize that not only should I drop all intentional right wingers out of my social life, I have to in order to develop as a person.

Someone told me that communist reducation camps could reform Nazis, but it took controlling every aspect of their lives and everyone they spoke to in order to reform them. That it cannot happen one-on-one on an interpersonal level.

I do not have the tools to reprogram dedicated right wingers. Even with people who are trying to be leftists, I need them to already be surrounded by other leftists so that I only have to fill one tiny gap at a time in their preexisting knowledge.

The more I learn the more I feel like a new person to politics. I don't think I'll ever have to choose right wingers as potential social circle members ever again. Right now I don't have to drink poisoned water anymore.

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[–] towhee@hexbear.net 8 points 3 days ago

Yeah I think if someone is being racist but doing the "but you're one of the good ones" shit (even using cloaked language) that is a very valid reason to not be their friend