Transfem

5036 readers

89 users here now

A community for transfeminine people and experiences.

This is a supportive community for all transfeminine or questioning people. Anyone is welcome to participate in this community but disrupting the safety of this space for trans feminine people is unacceptable and will result in moderator action.

Debate surrounding transgender rights or acceptance will result in an immediate ban.

Please follow the rules of the lemmy.blahaj.zone instance.
Bigotry of any kind will not be tolerated.
Gatekeeping will not be tolerated.
Please be kind and respectful to all.
Please tag NSFW topics.
No NSFW image posts.
Please provide content warnings where appropriate.
Please do not repost bigoted content here.

This community is supportive of DIY HRT. Unsolicited medical advice or caution being given to people on DIY will result in moderator action.

Posters may express that they are looking for responses and support from groups with certain experiences (eg. trans people, trans people with supportive parents, trans parents.). Please respect those requests and be mindful that your experience may differ from others here.

Some helpful links:

The Gender Dysphoria Bible // In depth explanation of the different types of gender dysphoria.
Trans Voice Help // A community here on blahaj.zone for voice training.
LGBTQ+ Healthcare Directory // A directory of LGBTQ+ accepting Healthcare providers.
Trans Resistance Network // A US-based mutual aid organization to help trans people facing state violence and legal discrimination.
TLDEF's Trans Health Project // Advice about insurance claims for gender affirming healthcare and procedures.
TransLifeLine's ID change Library // A comprehensive guide to changing your name on any US legal document.

Support Hotlines:

The Trevor Project // Web chat, phone call, and text message LGBTQ+ support hotline.
TransLifeLine // A US/Canada LGBTQ+ phone support hotline service. The US line has Spanish support.
LGBT Youthline.ca // A Canadian LGBT hotline support service with phone call and web chat support. (4pm - 9:30pm EST)
988lifeline // A US only Crisis hotline with phone call, text and web chat support. Dedicated staff for LGBTQIA+ youth 24/7 on phone service, 3pm to 2am EST for text and web chat.

founded 2 years ago

MODERATORS

LadyAutumn@lemmy.blahaj.zone

ada@lemmy.blahaj.zone

ada@piefed.blahaj.zone

An introduction and a thank you (lemmy.blahaj.zone)

submitted 4 days ago by Domi@lemmy.blahaj.zone to c/mtf@lemmy.blahaj.zone

12 comments fedilink hide all child comments

Hi, I'm Domi.

Long time lurker, first time poster. I just wanted to say that you have all helped me a great deal.

It's been long and slow journey unpacking the huge pile of internalised phobias that were pumped into my brain as an assumed male growing up in the 90s and 2000s. I have spent a long time in this very self-loathing "everyone is valid except me" way of thinking.

I've been reading your stories for a long time, the beautiful trans joy and difficult and terrible things too. You being here, being yourselves in all your glory, it has been a way for me to feel community and connection even before I could admit to myself who I really was.

So thank you all, thank you for sharing your joy, thank you sharing your hard times, thank you so much for being who you are. You've done more to help me than you can know.

you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments

[–] Domi@lemmy.blahaj.zone 2 points 3 days ago (1 children)

Thank you <3. Being called sister just made me feel very nice inside. I am very lucky in having some amazing friends and a supportive partner, but I have been scared to reach out to irl groups because I've really internalised the idea that those spaces aren't for me. I have some really dear close trans friends that have been hugely supportive but they live in other countries and we see eachother only maybe once per year.

I've recently been at some IRL events where I've introduced myself to new people (isn't it so nice to do that with a new person and they dont have to re-adjust any pre-conceived opinion about you and they just go "Hi Domi, nice to meet you" and it's no big deal? :)).

I am learning that a lot of those imposter fears that have held me back are not reflected when I actually do talk to people in trans spaces IRL. Even though I'm not yet very femme-presenting, everybody so far has made me feel welcome and valid. The same way you have here.

[–] captainlezbian@lemmy.world 1 points 3 days ago

Yeah those trans spaces are more for someone like you than someone like me (post transition). And yeah it really was this wild shift of thinking of such spaces as so scary to them turning out to be so welcoming. And eventually you just find your place in fellowship with other trans people.

The other thing is that knowing other people at a similar stage to yourself is hugely important. Someone my age who's just now transitioning is going to have a wildly different entire experience from me given I transitioned at 20 in college, but also it's long over. I remember the sleepless nights, the hormonal fights, the hope, and the dread and all that stuff, but it's in the same way I remember being 16. Both groups need people who are there and people who had been there recently to thrive.

But yeah, you're at the exciting and scary stage. Try to enjoy what you can of it, eventually being trans just becomes your normal.