this post was submitted on 21 Dec 2025
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I don't know what part of my boundary was equivocal.

Really, all I see it as is that they are invalidating queerness so much that they think a boundary based on queerness is totally valid for them to ignore.

I don't even know what to do.

cw: sa/mental healththey have a r*pist mentality, and honestly, the helplessness I feel comes so close that being in this situation reminds me of how distressed I felt during my SA. It honestly led me to tears right now. I hate how trauma from that literally had to be reignited just because my grandparents can't respect boundaries.

Oddly enough, they tried to use one of my uncles as a proxy a few days ago. They did this to ask me if I want Christmas lunch with them. I told them "No," but they still came. This is undoubtedly a r*pist mentality.

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[–] Kuori@hexbear.net 11 points 1 week ago

they are invalidating queerness so much that they think a boundary based on queerness is totally valid for them to ignore

pretty much. people who don't respect you are never going to respect your boundaries. add old people feeling like children (read: anyone younger than them) are just property + family entitlement and you have a shit sundae. my only recommendation is that being stoic and firm can sometimes see better results than your more explosive options (which will inevitably be taken as a tantrum/sign of immaturity and used to invalidate your feelings)

but realistically, you are probably unfortunately just going to have to endure them flagrantly disregarding your desires and plan to go full no contact entirely when you eventually find a new place.