this post was submitted on 23 Oct 2025
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As an almost embarassingly cis person, I am curious. Is this a matter of language, i.e. using Spanish pronouns in a Spanish speaking comm, or is it a matter of identifying differently in different contexts, or not showing your trans status to "outsiders" (outside instances)?
So, for me its about A) identifying differently in different spaces, and B) a matter of trusting people.
For the former, i might identify as woman in one space, but an creature in another, and "gender is bullshit" in yet another.
For the latter, take the example of it/its pronouns. Ive had them applied to me in a durogatory manner, which hurt and i didnt like. But from someone i trust, someone who i know gets it at least a little bit, those same pronouns bring joy. Broadly speaking, i would love to be "it/its, pup/pups, she/her (and maybe more)" in the trans mega, "she/her, it/its" on bearsite in general, and just "she/her" to outsiders or people who i dont feel i can trust. People will weaponize e.g. pup/pups pronouns against someone as an attack, and i dont trust non-bearsite people to not do that, and i dont trust the moderators of non-bearsite to view that behavior as unacceptable.
That all makes sense, thanks for telling me.
Personally I'm okay with some pronouns if you're cool
It's kinda an inside joke in the trans community that you "unlock" a second set of pronouns when you get to know one of us.
🤔🤔🤔
Interesting