this post was submitted on 20 Sep 2025
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I developed a system with one person I was dating that if she was ever just unpleasant for no reason at all, I would stop whatever else was going on and make a priority to feed her right away. She figured it out after a few times (while we were redirecting from what had been happening and into getting food), and she was sort of conflicted between being even more angry "how dare you I am not some kind of Skinner box experiment don't change the subject while I am giving you hell for (whatever)" and admitting that yes okay that is a very good strategy let's eat and I will probably become happy.
That's me!
The solution was secret snack packs. I have one under my seat in the car. I have a secret snack in my bag. If I'm out and a snack looks appealing, I sometimes buy it and hold onto it.