The Onion and other satire w/ layers

U.S. Ambassador Pete Hoekstra has vowed to improve anti-American sentiment he sees in Canada, no matter how many illegal tariffs, forced annexations, or literal bombs it takes to do it.

“I’m disappointed that I came to Canada,” Hoekstra said during a public event in Halifax. “A Canada that it would be very easy to target with 500% steel tariffs, or one patriot missile aimed at Parliament Hill, I might add.” [...]