this post was submitted on 04 Sep 2025
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He should attempt passing a camel through the eye of a needle first.
This can be done with science
Light speed camel is capable of many amazing feats
Dont even need to go that far, simply blend the camel first
Will it blend?
If Donald Trump blends himself into a slurry to get into heaven, I'm fine with that.
Yes, but science is liberal bullshit. Give trump money and he'll build the biggest, most beautiful eye of a needle.
A month later the St. Louis Arch will be renamed Trump Heaven Gateway^TM^. $10k ticket to walk through it to make sure you go to heaven and be with ~~god~~ trump
If it actually works then I support this too. The trip to heaven needs to be immediate and one-way though.
Some staffer needs to change out all his pills with smarties or sweet tarts. Need to stop letting science keep the science deniers alive. If god wanted you to live, he wouldn't have made McDonalds so delicious.
If someone would just spill a drop or two of visine in his coke...
They're gonna put a suicide spot on top where you can pay to "trump" yourself aren't they
Does general relativity make this any easier? I vaguely remember a podcast explaining a thought experiment where a car that is longer than a barn can shrink to fit in the bar. This is because the barn doors disagree on whether they are open/closed simultaneously based on the point of reference. So there must be a point of reference that shrinks the camel.
It gets shorter and more massive. From a certain viewpoint.
I'm probably not the guy to ask this question to, but I would speculate based on our currently available science, sufficiently warped spacetime could make this possible, however incredibly difficult to achieve without sufficient technology and energy.
It would be easier to use physical forces or chemical forces to turn the camel into material with low enough viscosity to pass through the needle. I don't believe it was stated anywhere that the camel had to be assembled upon delivery.
I don't have good confidence that the camel would comfortably survive, or even be correctly assembled, if it were stuffed through the same aperture using warped spacetime instead. Someone smarter than me would have to tackle that one, but spaghettification comes to mind.
I didn't know that crafting large barrel hoops was science...
He's given his daily kidney stone sample yes
Edit: huh."how can a rich guy get to heaven?" "piss a camels weight in kidney stones" has a ring to it. Jesus had a way with words apropos of nothing and having no linguistics skill at all I've decided this is how it was in the original Aramaic. Lol.