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Matrix servers have the problem of highly variable resource use.
Basically if you only use it for some light chatting with friends and family and some niche topic public rooms it isn't very heavy.
But if any user of your homeserver joins any busy rooms or uses the bridges to join busy public Telegram channels or such, it will quickly outgrow the resources of a reasonably priced VPS.
Personally I would rather recommend you to set up an xmpp server, which can include a gateway to Matrix and other services, but architecturally is much more lightweight and has better mobile clients.
Better mobile clients? Have things changed this much in the least three years?
I found snikket to be quite decent, give it a whirl.
Matrix mobile clients got worse, yes 😅
Otherwise not really. Three years ago Conversations was quite good already, although the newer forks Cheogram and Monocles added some nice convenience features.
Hm, I never really liked Conversations and decided to end xmpp for good. Maybe I need to give it another try but I really like some Matrix features.
How is the user experience compared to matrix? Is it easy to gateway towards matrix or other services? Can I easily join matrix or other communities servers?
I see a lot of people are now using matrix but not so many xmpp, but yeah it hoggs resources on my server too. Also I feel like it's still pretty buggy..
Xmpp itself works great. The slidge.im bridges are relatively new and your mileage will vary. Matrix, Discord and Telegram works ok, Signal & Facebook messenger have issues right now, WhatsApp is a bit tricky to set up properly.
ooh! how do we bridge to matrix from xmpp server?
edit all i can find is how to do it from a matrix server
https://slidge.im/
It basicallly allows you to remote control an existing Matrix account on a remote homeserver. Works quite well.
Link doesn't work
Works here 🤷
Works now for me!