What else would happen in Heck?
this post was submitted on 12 Feb 2025
608 points (97.8% liked)
Funny: Home of the Haha
6235 readers
593 users here now
Welcome to /c/funny, a place for all your humorous and amusing content.
Looking for mods! Send an application to Stamets!
Our Rules:
-
Keep it civil. We're all people here. Be respectful to one another.
-
No sexism, racism, homophobia, transphobia or any other flavor of bigotry. I should not need to explain this one.
-
Try not to repost anything posted within the past month. Beyond that, go for it. Not everyone is on every site all the time.
Other Communities:
-
/c/TenForward@lemmy.world - Star Trek chat, memes and shitposts
-
/c/Memes@lemmy.world - General memes
founded 2 years ago
MODERATORS
you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments
view the rest of the comments
Heck only has public toilets.
The stall door squeaks really loud.
The gaps between the door and the wall are nearly half an inch.
There's always skid marks in the bowl and the last person didn't flush.
There's piss dribbles on the seat.
The toilet paper dispenser gives out individual sheets by cranking a knob on the side.
The knob is hard to turn, and sticky.
There's a small puddle of piss on the floor between your feet where you drop your dacks.
You are only wearing socks because shoes are illegal in heck.
You have 4 minutes each day to do your poos.
They allocate your poo schedule, not you.
If you go over your allocated time, the floor opens up and you fall into actual hell.
In actual hell, you only get 2 minutes a day on the toilet.
The individual sheets are that shitty 2-ply that separates into 1-ply that's a nanometer thick and basically transparent.
Your finger always goes through. Every time.
The toilet water splashes you with precision accuracy in the anus. Every time.
Also it's not just a half-inch crack in the stall door, but someone keeps jiggling the handle and peeking, still standing there when you come out.
There's also no ventilation and it's super hot and humid in there, so it smells like a pissy rainforest and you sweat in the 40 C air so much that the toilet paper turns to mush when you wipe your sweat-drenched crack.