Today I Learned

It sounds like your whole world has been turned upside down, and it’s like everything you love is being taken away from you.

Oh, you have no idea. I didn't even go too deep on losing my Grandma. I at least understood losing her. It made logical sense. She has always been my hero in life, but she was also 103. Which I'll nonironically say is still too young to lose someone of her wit and presence. It's always too early to lose your hero. But again, my brain processed why it happened.

What my brain is struggling with is everything I mentioned in the initial post, and other stuff that wasn't related so I didn't mention it.

For example, in pro-wrestling there is a move called the Lariat. There is a similar but different move known as the Clothesline. And most people just think of the two as the same thing. They look strikingly similar to the point that even commentators on the show mess it up, or use the terms interchangeably. The move is performed when one wrestler is running at another wrestler. The attacking wrestler uses his arm to club the other in the chest, and he falls down. Now, the difference is, a Lariat has Latino history dating back to the mexican wrestling days of the late 1890s. A Lariat is where you the attacker use your momentum to strike your opponent. This YOU are the one causing the clubbing of the chest.

A clothesline actually gets it's history from the north east wrestling background of the 1920s. It uses the momentum of your opponent to club his own chest using your extended arm. You hold out your arm stiff, your opponent runs into it, and that's it. That's a clothesline. You don't move your arm, but with a Lariat you would.

Now, with all that said, keep in mind that everything I've just said, the history lesson, the differentiation between nearly identical looking moves, it all refers to a form of entertainment that is all centered around two athletic actors presenting a live stunt scene before an audience of thousands in attendance, and millions watching around the world. All to showcase a fake fight that is marketed heavily towards children, but demographically watched almost exclusively by men over the age of 40. And here I am presenting a difference so minute that 99% of people who view it have no idea there even IS a difference, including those that produce it. A wrestler by the name of JBL (John Bradshaw Layfield) uses the "Clothesline from Hell". Which infuriates me SO much, because his version is ALWAYS a Lariat. Most of the time, HE does the running, which makes his version a variation known as the STANDING Lariat.

I could go on a smaller rant on my obsession with a literal 6 inch piece of rope attached to 2 of the 4 ring posts, and the purpose it serves, that everybody ignores. I could explain the difference in a ball bearing spring based ring vs a gridlock bar style ring and the differences it puts on wrestlers bodies. I could showcase how different companies use different materials for different rings. Or how the championship belt you see on TV isn't 1 belt, and the reasons why. I could explain the territory system, and the importance it's had on the entire industry which has lasting effects to this day despite being abolished over 40 years ago. I could talk your ear off all day about the smallest of topics of pro wrestling, and go suuuuuper in depth to beyond obsessed levels.

So imagine how deep I've peeled that onion. And now realize that I don't even watch pro wrestling really anymore. I don't go to local shows. I just found out earlier today (so that would be Wednesday) that Monday Night Raw was 2 days ago in my home city of Cleveland. I didn't even know.

So imagine how big of a hole in my own sense of being there is inside me. It feels like I don't know who I am. It feels like I outgrew something that was a massive part of my mentality, but I never replaced even a fraction of it with anything. It's just empty. I feel like less of me exists. That was why I spent 2 months almost daily at the ballpark watching baseball. I wanted to distract myself and get back to my roots. In the 90s, Carlos Baerga's sister used to live next door to me. And in 1994, Jacobs Field was opened. It's called Progressive Field now, but various remodels aside, it's the same building. I can still navigate that ballpark like Kenny Lofton is stealing 2nd at any time. It helps that Tom Hamilton is STILL the radio announcer for the now renamed Guardians. The only thing that's missing is that John Adams passed away during covid. The stadium doesn't sound the same without him. That stadium is my happy place. But I'm getting off topic.

In 2016 the biggest donation and often said the single entity that financed the entire 2016 trump campaign was (now former) WWE owner Vince McMahon. Now Vince in recent years has been involved with a sex scandal that goes back to before I was born. It's the reason he's no longer involved with the company. He's been rightfully whitewashed of the company in much the same way Chris Beniot has been rightfully whitewashed of the company. But his fingerprints are still all over WWE. His son in law, who spent literal decades learning from him, and cites him as his biggest inspiration is the closest thing to Vinces old position. The company still employs MOSTLY the same people. This is not some new different WWE. This is the same company that financed trump, who even "owned" the company in 2009 (storyline, it was just because he was buddy buddy with Vince). The same company that has roots with trump dating back the the 80s. Two of the Wrestlemanias (I think 6 and 7) were from "Trump Plaza". I put that in quotes because the show sold poorly, and had to be moved to a smaller venue on the outskirts of trump plaza....but they still claimed it was trump plaza.

And every time I try to watch WWE, I just feel dirty. I feel like I'm contributing to the problems we have in the world today. I know it's no longer the donation system it used to be, but my boycott started almost a decade ago. And I had been watching since the 80s.

There's other things like that, but just imagine how big that was to me......and then not being able to enjoy it. And being told that YOU'RE the problem. That it's signs of depression. Which it may be, but also it's a feeling of guilt over having contributed SO MUCH MONEY over the decades that all went to trump in 2016. And I know it's crazy to think this way, but it makes me feel like I'm the problem causer in the world.

And then I see all these people STILL supporting WWE, and ask them how they feel, and they separate the two. They support the idea of Chris Beniot going into the hall of fame, they don't understand why Martha Hart REFUSES to put Owen Hart into the hall of fame, and can't grasp the fact that the hall of fame doesn't mean shit. It's a tv show they put on once a year. That's it. Real life succeeds that.

I'm sorry. I'm ranting. I just......AHHH!!! I needed to vent. And I don't have anybody to do that with.