this post was submitted on 02 Feb 2025
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So, uh. Hi .
This is gonna seem a little out of character and I won’t blame you for feeling a little out of sorts about this whole thing… but I’ve been compromised by a master haxxor from the dark webz and I need to get out in front of this.
Please find enclosed a portfolio of photographs in .pdf and zip archive, mostly comprised of my dick ‘n balls.
ps. Sorry, Gram-gam. I made bad choices.
pps. Kevin, I’d understand if you’d prefer I didn’t come into work on Monday.