My best firing was from a job I got hired for at 16. Seasonal help for Victoria’s Secret in a local mall. This seems like a random detail, but makes the firing even funnier to me: VS (at least, this one) was bisected into the lingerie half of the store and the perfume/cosmetics half of the store. I was hired to work the perfume counter.

It was their holiday hiring push, so myself and a half dozen other women or so came in for a full day of group training—like get there ass early for hours of dumb safety/theft videos, paperwork, mock customer interactions & sales transactions on the POS, etc.

We finish all this up, and the trainer is congratulating us for being done as one of the managers is arriving for her shift. The trainer encourages us to introduce ourselves to the manager and each other & releases us for the day. I wasn’t shy, and was the first one to shake manager’s hand. She makes small talk and asks what scheduling preferences I had submitted. In response, I mentioned something about classes and she asks what college I go to.

When I laugh and correct her with the name of my high school, her face changes and she asks my age. “Oh, uhhh you can’t work here.” I am confused and tell her that I listed my correct information on the application. “Yeah, sorry, someone made a mistake. We only hire 18+ employees.”

To work the perfume counter. In a panties store. Meanwhile, 2023 me likes to periodically glance at Target’s growing sex toy selection (that is presumably stocked/rung up/at least VIEWED by minor employees) because it still feels novel. Victoria still had to mail me a check for training hours and can go fuck herself 😂