Windows Support (shitposting)

So our cishet furry VRC post-ironic microlabel (decentralized) polycule decided we're switching to Scientific Linux ತ⁠_⁠ʖ⁠ತ because one of us fancies nano polymers in their fursuit in her spare time and she is very funny (⁠ ⁠´⁠◡⁠‿⁠ゝ⁠◡⁠⁠) so I want to support the girl boss to live her truth♥⁠╣⁠[⁠-⁠_⁠-⁠]⁠╠⁠♥ problem is when I go to microsoft.com (⁠｡⁠・⁠/⁠/⁠ε⁠/⁠/⁠・⁠｡⁠) there are not many instructions ┻⁠┻⁠︵⁠¯⁠\⁠(⁠ツ⁠)⁠/⁠¯⁠︵⁠┻⁠┻, one asks me to download something called microsoft Edge, will this give me the abilit*t*y to edge mo*o*re ԅ⁠(⁠ ͒⁠ ⁠۝ ͒⁠ ⁠)⁠ᕤ or what that's welcome but that's best left for playtime ✧⁠◝⁠(⁠⁰⁠▿⁠⁰⁠)⁠◜⁠✧ for business theres something called terminal ◼️(⁠●⁠’⁠3⁠)⁠♡⁠(⁠ε⁠⁠●⁠) but I checked my symptoms (⁠╬⁠☉⁠д⁠⊙⁠)⁠⊰⁠⊹ฺ and I have no terminal ones (⁠人⁠ ⁠•͈⁠ᴗ⁠•͈⁠) so am I just sol乁⁠ʕ⁠ ⁠•̀⁠ ⁠۝ ⁠•́⁠ ⁠ʔ⁠ㄏ? AITA for just sticking with Windows and work on de-siloing comms for the CIA (⁠~⁠‾⁠▿⁠‾⁠)⁠~ the rest of my life having never given an ounce of authenticity to the world ༼⁠;⁠´⁠༎ຶ⁠ ⁠۝ ⁠༎ຶ⁠༽? Thanks, Kind regards 🙏

Recently I decided to make the decision to change my browser to Firefox after my 16 year-old-son said it was "based". When navigating to the download page from Microsoft Edge, it claimed that Edge was better than Firefox because it had 60% of the features and none of the privacy. Despite the tempting claims, I proceeded anyway and set Firefox as my default browser. After a couple of days, I went to turn on my computer, and it said it was "installing updates"; when it booted on, Firefox was gone from my computer, and Edge was set as the default browser! I brushed this off as a bug, but the same thing happened four days later! What did I do wrong?

So I have a 40 year old son and I decided to check his computer like other parents do. Usually when I check my son's computer, it just has the normal desktop you're supposed to see on your computer: a white screen that says Gooogle.com or something, whatever the kids do these days. Search history is also empty so I know that my husband doesn't use the internet like a naughty child. But then I accidentally moved the little paperweight on his desk and a pointer moved to the corner of the screen, right above the a red X. I tapped the paperweight, and there was a little button!, I pressed the button, and the screen changed! There's a picture that showed up with so many weird icons, the bottom bar had a thing that seemed like the devil made it to be parent-proof! I don't know what to do please help my son has hid a whole special hacker interface from me to hide his devolution into sin.

I have one Windows machine in a Linux household, and it's also the only machine who's having problems. It has taken upon itself to stop networking. This is a problem on Wi-Fi and wired. Rebooting the machine, turning off the firewall, or disabling and re-enabling the adapters sometimes helps, but not always. What else should I look for?

I was using my wife's boyfriend's gaming PC to play farmville when I came to the conclusion that since windows implemented the WSL it is officially the best Linux distro. No other distro has better software availability and driver support. Any thoughts?

Hi. I just noticed my Windows Pro is neither a professional nor does it have a window.

I also tried Windows Home but there was no house.

I think I was scammed. Help. This is there I got it from.

I work as level 1 IT at a university, and one day recently we had a bunch of guys from M$ come for a 3 day long seminar/conference on security, hosted at the uni.

When they arrived it was my job to get them setup (give them extra HDMIs because our setup is basically docking stations locked in boxes, and there was no way I would be installing drivers on each and every PC they had.

Anyway, the first guy I was helping setup had a Windows logo on his laptop (do they make hardware as well?), running Win11. It took all of about 3 minutes for his laptop to blue screen.

I just looked at him, shrugged, and cheekily said, "Windows, amirite".

I did not get a response, funnily enough xD

help

McAfee's claiming there ain't a single worm in sight, but I'm feeling mighty perplexed here. Now, what in tarnation can I possibly do to tackle this conundrum? Should I reckon it's high time to pick up the phone and dial Microsoft support for some good ol' fashioned assistance? By golly, I sure hope they've got the answer to my technological pickle!

Windows DE sucks. What are some good alternatives?

I recently learned about this minimal windows manager and I thought it would be a good way to help speed up my pc. I can't seem to find any installer though and when I finally found the download link it gave me an unknown file.

can anyone offer advice on what I should do, I'm on hastal avista BTW

any help pls?

Hello, one of my windows broke, can someone please come and replace the glass for me? Ktnxbye

:(