The stuff on reddit can get wild. Or it could. I don't browse there anymore, since the events of last year.

Yeah they just had to kill the third-party clients and set their platform on fire. Well not "they", we all know who is at fault, but this is not that kind of post and we're not turning it into one.

If only there was some way of maybe scheduling a headless browser to steal all the juicy stuff that might be left without providing any more value to the platform... if only. 😇

I don't want people to feel that I'm pushing sexual stuff on them, and I don't want kids to come across it. So that's why I made the censored version.

Probably a good call, though sexuality is definitely part of a healthy life (no offence, asexual peeps) and that means there should be a place for that kind of engagement.

Speaking of ridiculous US things... yeah, you got the perfect mix of absolute bullshit there. Really makes me think about my frame of reference sometimes. If you're willing enough, maybe just bite the bullet and help them set up matrix/signal? The privacy benefits alone should be enough to convince them, let alone that it's a more versatile solution than facebook as a front-end for your community.

And I'm still super nervous about going out fully fem.

Yeah, the world at large is not a cosy place. There will be a point in time or a geographical location where you're comfortable with it, I'm sure.

"It'd be weird at first." which isn't a good reason.

It's reason enough to feel anxious, maybe not reason enough to just accept and let it stop you from doing something in your own interest. You might just be afraid of people thinking differently of you, even though they won't show it. Which is perfectly reasonable. What you have going for you is that if you did go there, you always the option of never coming back again if you get a negative result. That will definitively shift your focus towards finding new people to connect with.

Thanks for sharing! Can't quite recall if I've ever met a butch lesbian trans woman before, but that's probably just lack of exposure on my part. Your description of "masculine woman" is definitely a vivid one though, and it makes sense to me.

I don't really know how I'd rate myself on a "Masculine-feminine" spectrum.

Great news! Staying true to the definition or existence of a masculine-feminine spectrum was never the point of this post, and you managed to satisfy my curiosity without even answering this question. So yeah, fuck the spectrum, it doesn't exist. 😇

The other thing that has piqued my interest is your preference for socializing with women. Have you given any thought to the reason behind that, or does it just play out that way? As with everyone else I've asked a follow-up question, don't feel obligated to answer if you feel I'm prying too much.

Oh god, what have you done?! My impulse control is definitely being tested here! (╯°□°）╯︵ ┻━┻)

The stuff probably contains phenolphtalein pH indicator, which turns pink in alkaline conditions. Our saliva varies between a pH of 6.3 to about 7.9 with 7 being considered neutral. Not sure if 7.9 is alkaline enough for the color change to dramatic enough, so it might contain something else that works at a different range. Principle is the same though: Magic colour changing chemical meets pH that isn't quite neutral and turns itself pink.

And thank you! Not only for your kind words, but for being the kind of person who makes this kind of platform available and welcoming. It's a lovely encouragement to engage with this community and gives a beautiful outlet and inlet for ideas and conversation.

Aww thanks for your kind words! I actually joined here not too long after lurking for a while because it seemed like a safe place to try and express a side of myself that I don't really share with the public yet. Figured this would be a good place to experiment interacting with people that have a chance of understanding what I'm finding out about myself. The goal was always a mix of shitposting, celebrating differences, discussing interesting things, providing others with a laugh and leaving wholesome messages. Your feedback counts as a big compliment and tells me I'm probably doing well at the wholesome part.

Partly because of my OCD feeding me intrusive thoughts about sexuality for most of my teens.

Our brains can be such a problem sometimes! Though to be fair we're similar on that front, and it took me a while to come to terms with it as well. It's likely because of the feelings either not being very strong or very consistent that you're going to doubt them. OCD surely doesn't help though.

• Social tolerance: it's... complicated? Irl I'm the type that starts out very reserved, but if I spend enough time with someone, something in my head clicks and then I never shut up when I'm with them.

Oh yeah, that's definitely me as well. Always have trouble with people I don't know because I'm not sure how they will respond to me. As soon as the baseline has been established and I feel comfortable they're free game! 😅

finsexual maybe? Finromantic?

I'll look into it, thanks!

I think that introversion/extroversion and reclusion/outgoingness are actually different spectrums. You can be outgoing but still need time alone to recharge your social batteries.

And this is exactly the kind of nuance I was looking for! Thanks for being critical. Framing it this way definitely helps to explain my weird love-hate relationship with other people. There might be a third dimension to it, but I'll save that brainbreaker for another time.

Thanks for your contribution!

Thank you for sharing!

Hi Cait, thank you for taking the time to share!

If we took fear out of the equation somehow, do you feel it's useful to have a distinction between your personal identity and what you're comfortable with presenting to the outside world? I know anxiety about how my surroundings would react is definitely keeping me from experimenting with my appearance more than I do. But until I do, there's probably no way to know for sure if there would still be some sort of disconnect between internal indentity and presenting identity.

I'm Attracted to feminity in general, but basically anyone with boobs can do, depending on the Person

Hey we're similar on that front! From your wording I take it that you also prefer boobs over butts? There's just something about them... [slips into daydream]

With both ADHD and autism, communication with most ppl is very challengen and exhausting for me, so I just like to hang around ppl who can actually get behind what I'm saying, regardless of their gender

From my experience in interacting with autistic people (kind of a given with a tech background), I've always found that most people simply don't understand what autism is like and as a result most interactions are missing the communicative parts crucial to someone with autism. As the HSP idiot I usually end up being the one to translate and explain to them what's causing all the friction (which is self-interest, since friction affects me).

I've witnessed multiple times that people can't stand the autistic person until I explain to them what's really going on, and it usually changes their demeanor towards them drastically.

I feel like you might gravitate towards people who can instinctively notice your needs and will at the very least not strike out against them.

Thanks for sharing! Sad to hear the bar is so low and your community still can't get their shit together. When is the world going to learn it's the transphobic bigots we should be afraid of?!

Any amount of labels changing around is lilely a sign that the labels themselves are a shit representation (which, coincidentslly is also why there are so many of them). The entire point of this post was to give people some space to express the "ifs and buts" of their identities, which you've done a great job at.

Wow, thanks so much for sharing this! Truly beautiful and inspiring to read.

I think I get the whole fuckable friends part, even though it doesn't quite work that way for me. You already share a certain bond of friendship, trust or intimacy to a certain degree. So I see how that could open up the door for things to progress beyond platonic.

Alignment of kinks is probably more important for a healthy sex life than most people realise, and at least from my experience compromise never works out in the long term.

Your story on confidence, self-esteem and becoming more outgoing definitely hits home, as I imagine it will for many here. I used to be pretty outgoing as a kid, but high school and a combination of factors changed that dramatically. Reaching emotional maturity earlier than my peers, HSP and witnessing the sheer evil early teens are capable of all around me turned me into the quiet kid that somehow managed to stand out. Kinda hard to be outgoing when you don't quite trust or like anyone around you. New environments and fresh starts definitely help out though, and studying was definitely the tipping point. I've been clawing my way back to my childhood self-esteem ever since. And I'm proud to say I'm getting there.

All in all happy to hear you managed a way to stop denying yourself the attention you deserve, as this post proves you're worth listening to. Definitely going to take some inspiration from your story.

Oh and now I need this magic PH lipstick, where can I get some?

That's a nice take! It is indeed the absurdity of it all that probably does it. My comment was more of a shower thought inspired by this post than a direct reaction to it.

As you can probably tell from my choice of pronouns, I'm still figuring out what the concept of "being gay" even means to me. Though there's probably no point to doing so. Which only makes being called gay even funnier to me.

That, and of course the ridiculous concepts of what does and does not make you gay, that are going around. But that's part of the original joke.

I get the feeling this is somehow going to get more facebook moms who somehow get their hands on these than it is going to get people on here. Which is still stupidly funny.

Oh yeah thankfully I live in a very safe and tolerant country, so no worries there. Though you have conservative nutjobs everywhere.

The anxiety probably stems more from the thought of being perceived as unpredictable than from the way people might view the identity itself. Which is probably why it feels like I should have it figured out.

Then there's also the part where the sooner you have it figured out, the longer you get to live as your true self... maybe? How does one definitively crack an egg?

See, I always imagined Aussies as redneck brits, but somehow more approachable and friendly. But as they are quite literally on the other side of the world, I haven't interacted with enough Aussies to confirm or deny such prejudice.

You guys really as friendly as my imagination suggests?