Yeah you seem overly stressed... Few things not sure if anyone mentioned it... But a 3 week old can and will eat while sleeping... It's totally normal... They have a reflex for it...
You probably should talk to someone yourself...
You don't seem like a deadbeat anything... It's totally normal to have no feelings for your child when they are born ... People go through it... Get help yourself talk to someone in real life....
The stress of having to pick up all the slack probably isn't going to go away anytime soon... Figure it out before all you have is resentment...
You will be fine and it does get easier, men don't have that same instant bond for babies like mothers do normally...
Edit: It doesn't matter, the mattress is making an impossible shape/bend... It's definitely AI generated... Even if it was two separate mattresses, it still wouldn't make sense...