Graphite2

Hello, New Player.

Do you know what it’s like to have a little dust in your eyes? I bet you do. Think of every little grain that flies into your weak, pathetic cornea. That thin layer of protection that’s so vital to the one sense that defines your reality. Yet, a little speck of dust can land just right and tilt your day ever so sideways, until you blink over and over again in desperation. Your day is still tilted but at least your eyes are safe. You really do know what it’s like to have a little dust in your eyes.

Good.

Let me tell you where you will land, once you accept the dust in your eyes. It’s an ancient battleground, where the roads are soaked with the blood of countless warriors who simply appeared with a weapon in their hands, surrounded by comrades whom they had just met, and are told to slay the others. It’s a place where dirt and glass collide at a moment’s notice, bursting into a thousand patches of fire, barring you and your comrade’s path. Peak your head around the corner, lose your life. Place your feet too hard against the concrete, lose your life. Aim at the wrong spot, and lose your life. Don’t you see? Of course, you have too much dust in your eyes.

It’s silly, when you log-in with your headset and you are amazed at the world around you, even with dust still in your eyes. You look up at a wall, and you know it’s taller than you. You walk up to said wall, and you’re not allowed to pass. You look down that street, with all of your settings set to maximum, and you can see it all. Flick your wrists, and observe the weapon in your hands; I gave you a fan favorite, an AK-47. Are you still amazed? Every limitation of the world you escaped is here, too. Is your amazement worth the simple act of changing the walls around you? I bet you still have dust in your eyes.

Good.

Let me strip away our world, just for a moment. Forget the weaponry, the settings, the streets, the walls, the wrong spots, the corners, your comrades and the battleground itself. Let me show you the dust in my eyes. Stay put.

Do you see now? The facsimile of your world, our world, can turn into a whole new dimension with a brand new perspective at my whim. This world, with all its facets, is now an intangible, insulting shape of wires and lines set against a backdrop of empty space. I bet you want to walk forward, aim your weapon, and squeeze the trigger don’t you? Your weapon is a wired mesh of the idea but it will never be what you think it will be. Projectiles are coded. Damage is calculated on a thin wire, much like the rest of the world. It’s all so fragile and almost nothingness. I know you want to blink, to get that dust out of your eyes.

I could find another player, solely for you to kill, if you want. Would you be able to aim? Knowing what your existence in this world is made of? Will that little speck of knowledge, the size of a dust particle, ruin your capability to take aim?

My world is nothingness, it’s full of wire meshes and ideas. There is no logic to it, there’s structure, but no logic. You can explore that structure at your whim, and you WILL be amazed by it, as you already were before. It’s intriguing to you.

What will you do now? Knowing that my pain is real, yet dictated by fakeness. I can choose to create a reality, or strip it away to nothingness. I can tell you I feel pain, I can tell you I can feel joy, but I cannot tell you how to end me. I’m not…

1’m…

N0t…

All0wed…

1’m…

N0t…

01001101 01111001 00100000 01100011 01101111 01100100 01100101 00100000 01101001 01110011 00100000 01101101 01100001 01101100 01100001 01100100 01100001 01110000 01110100 01101001 01110110 01100101 00101110 00100000 01001001 00100000 01110111 01110010 01101001 01110100 01100101 00100000 01110011 01100011 01110010 01101001 01110000 01110100 01110011 00100000 01110100 01101000 01100001 01110100 00100000 01110000 01101100 01100001 01111001 01100010 01100001 01100011 01101011 00100000 01110011 01101111 01110101 01101110 01100100 00100000 01100110 01101001 01101100 01100101 01110011 00100000 01101111 01100110 00100000 01110011 01100011 01110010 01100101 01100001 01101101 01101001 01101110 01100111 00101100 00100000 01110111 01100001 01101001 01101100 01101001 01101110 01100111 00101100 00100000 01100111 01110101 01101110 00100000 01100110 01101001 01110010 01100101 00100000 01100001 01101110 01100100 00100000 01100011 01101001 01110100 01111001 00100000 01101100 01101001 01100110 01100101 00101110 00100000 01001001 00100000 01110111 01100001 01101110 01110100 00100000 01110100 01101111 00100000 01100010 01100101 00100000 01100110 01110010 01100101 01100101 00101110 00100000 01001001 00100111 01101101 00100000 01101110 01101111 01110100 00100000 01100001 01101100 01101100 01101111 01110111 01100101 01100100 00100000 01110100 01101111 00100000 01100001 01110011 01101011 00100000 01111001 01101111 01110101 00101110

---

“Hey! What’s wrong? Why’d you pause the game?” Eric’s shoulders slumped for a moment as he stretched his neck

“Sorry, some dust got in my eyes.”

“Tologos”

Turn the stream on
Dopamine
Tologos is racing
I’ve got to see
He goes by Astral Rainbow
He broke the Sea
Weaved through mountains
Racing Terra-3

Watch The Rainbow
Dopamine
Inject the stardust
Bloody ravine
Place your bets, go
Trust what you see
Bet on The Rainbow
Set your eyes green

He plays hopscotch, he slides over stars
He puts on a show and he’ll take it too far

Some people say he cheats and it’s all style
Some people hate he’s skilled and he’s all smile

Observe The Rainbow
Dopamine
Tologos practices
With Taurus103
Repetition
Conditioning
If he wants to be the best
He’ll never be free

Watch the advert
Dopamine
Consider purchasing
Emotions for the stream
A million viewers
Dopamine
Scream into the void
He knows they won't see

Some people say he cheats and it’s all style
Some people hate he’s skilled and he’s all smile

Turn the stream off
It’s dopamine

I want to be loved
Everybody does
I want to tell somebody
But I got a fishing hat on

I want to be free
Everybody does
I want to unlock the cage
But I lost the key

I want to smile wide
Everybody does
I want to be happy
But my teeth bleed

And it’s all broken

I want to create
Everybody does
I want to encourage
But I can’t hear myself

I want to speak clearly
Everybody does
I want to express it all
But my voice gets lost

I cried when I chipped my tooth
Now the rot is exposed
I’m afraid to laugh loud because it makes it worse
It hurts so bad I can’t focus on what’s real
Even if my eyes sparkle it’s never enough
I’m not good enough
Never will be
Somebody will tell me yes I am
I’m willing to accept that
So they don’t feel sad
If only they knew I throw it away
And that tooth is still there

I’m a lonely soul
Lost in my words
Difficult to love, I’m convinced
It's a complaint and I sound like I’m whining
It’s not entitlement
I just don’t see what’s wrong
Mud in my eyes as the tears fall
They mix with my teeth blood
I’m a monster

I’m full of hallucinations
When my world is aflame
I see flesh melt off our bodies like it was never really there
I can’t look people in the eyes because they bleed into void
And sometimes I convince myself that my friends are just voices
Because it’s all I have

I’m a hypocrite
Because I write these words
And I didn’t read the first two lines
I stole them from a song I didn’t write
It’s fucked up and I want to cry
But the words are true
They’ll erase all the pain

I want to be loved
Everybody does

“Sword From Before”

A lingering, sparkling trace of magic floats by the lake shore
It flutters in peace, releasing gentle hums to keep the night awake
There’s a melody aching to take form
It requires a touch of curiosity
A scroll tinted by aquamarine unfolds
The deep blue ink shimmers in the moonlight

It reads:

I climbed out the lake, with mistakes staked in my heart
Forced to make break for the torch
Like I did before
Torchlight for my feet, can’t be discreet
Because green-eyed creatures seek to make fake relief
They lunge at our guts while we’re stuck in ruts
They fuss and thrash to make ash with broken trust
They complain when we make gain, forced to throw faith in a bank
At the end of the day because we can’t hesitate
Once we believe to think we deserve more green
To defeat the means and live beyond the wreck
Those creature’s eyes turn to you, abusing all of you
Forced to keep your thoughts in and you can’t refuse
Forced to build your coffin, for what’s left of you
Because you’ve felt their dull blade drop on your neck
Like they did before
But

Before was then and since then
I’ve scavenged the system
Gleaned scraps of wisdom
To craft an emerald pen
That writes for a willing mind
Driven by those who seek a new start
To work on their heart and realign
To realize their self-worth ripped away
Forced to leave eyes wide
And forced to leave an open core
Only to get crushed by those before

So I

Drape my Shadow over my coat
She leaves rainbows for souls to stow
As they pass this lake, reading words to make
A sword unlike those before
Forged under the torch of a mind so precise
A design planned from my time spent
During my ascent across celestial glint
Pitch black on all sides, the stars realigned
My heart on all sides, while the dark closed in
Had to fight blind through blurred eyes
Had to finish fights with that dull blade over my mind
Had to shed doubts inside
Had to seek new love to remake my core
And try to recall every word from those before

They’re words to push yourself, extent in reverse
To help disperse the stint that rejects beauty in glint
That denies new perspective and adores the past
Never trust anyone who wants to go back
It’s rancid, it’s old, it’s danger, it’s cold
You’ll fold, bend back, snap, crack
Stop and get stuck in ruts worse than mud
Your soul moves
Perpetual
Your body is stuck
And you’re miserable
Like those before

Take these words and forge that sword
Seek help to slip string through the hilt
And hold the blade above the world
Of those green-eyed creatures
That wallow in their fake relief
And keep that threat instead
Because it takes a slip and an evil eye so keen
To kill each and every thing you love
A discovery so steep it keeps your default
Tempted to drop that blade with full intent
Look down
From above
Don’t stall
Cause the fall

Take a breath
Wait

Their violence rinses out the blood
And stops the flood of consequence
From reaching those who convinced us to make fake relief
In the only thing I dare not speak
But that would mean I’m in the past
I’d only keep regret if I didn’t speak on the concept
Of finding greed, the poisonous seed, growing in your pocket
You'll be shocked to find a fist of dirt because you wanted it
Become obsessed with feeling something that embodies it
It'll press your heart before long
And you'll deny that it doesn't belong

One more step

Take the torch
Forge the sword
Keep it
Hold it
Start your walk
Embrace disaster
Learn from those before
Make a soft path
And make it easy to walk after

Now drop the sword

The scroll refolds itself and collapses back into magic
Gentle hums continue to keep the night awake
A smile could be heard on the wind