I dance. I love to dance actually. It’s the only time and place where I can actually stop thinking for as long as I’m there. It has helped a ton for my mental health. It is the absolute breathing room I need while swimming in an ocean.

Right now we are rehearsing for a show which is set for about a month from now. Our dance performance could be better, it’s not bad but it really could be better. So this week one of our members straight-up said how unsure she is about whether or not she will be able to do the routine properly for the show. And I can’t really blame her. I could even hear she was fighting back tears while confessing her doubts. (I even thought I could hear it in the teachers voice as well, but I’m not too sure.) Anyway, teacher said she would rehearse a little extra with her next week.

It’s sadly also still common occurrence for some of our dance members to just not show up without any notice. So their missing out on practice time which we really need. But this time I heard one of our dancers just quit. So after class I asked my teacher what the deal was. It was because she (the dance who quit) didn’t like the routine and was upset we weren’t learning any new moves anymore.

“Is she coming back then for next season?” (because then we would learn new moves again) I asked.

“I really doubt it” she replied.

And I was THIS close to just straight up say: “Wow, that’s messed up.” (As a reference to the psychiatrist from Office Space)

TLDR: Dance class is not going that well. There is a cloud of despair hanging about. It makes me depressed again and I don’t know how to wave it away.

Edit: Repost, I wasn't sure if this really fits this community because I really just wanted to get this off my chest. Otherwise feel free to remove, I won't post it again.

I dance. I love to dance actually. It's the only time and place where I can actually stop thinking for as long as I'm there. It has helped a ton for my mental health. It is the absolute breathing room I need while swimming in an ocean.

Right now we are rehearsing for a show which is set for about a month from now. Our dance performance could be better, it's not bad but it really could be better. So this week one of our members straight-up said how unsure she is about whether or not she will be able to do the routine properly for the show. And I can't really blame her. I could even hear she was fighting back tears while confessing her doubts. (I even thought I could hear it in the teachers voice as well, but I'm not too sure.) Anyway, teacher said she would rehearse a little extra with her next week.

It's sadly also still common occurrence for some of our dance members to just not show up without any notice. So their missing out on practice time which we really need. But this time I heard one of our dancers just quit. So after class I asked my teacher what the deal was. It was because she (the dance who quit) didn't like the routine and was upset we weren't learning any new moves anymore.

"Is she coming back then for next season?" (because then we would learn new moves again) I asked.

"I really doubt it" she replied.

And I was THIS close to just straight up say: "Wow, that's messed up." (As a reference to the psychiatrist from Office Space)

TLDR: Dance class is not going that well. There is a cloud of despair hanging about. It makes me depressed again and I don't know how to wave it away.

I've had this account for about a week or so now. but I still cannot upload any images. Granted I have not exactly used it all that much I don't know if that has anything to do with it?

I am currently struggling heavily with depression. Which impacts my quality of sleep. Sleep now has never been a talent of mine. So I generally make up for it by napping. I used to absolutely love it. Both the initial and the waking up (feeling well rested). But lately the waking up part is getting more and more difficult. It then feels like someone hung an anchor on my mental health. I am at that point in absolute disarray and so depressed it makes me feel anxious it's so bad.

This may be above lemmy's pay grade but still here goes. Should I stop taking naps? Also I'm thinking of taking antidepressants, anyone here have any experience?

Edit: Thank you all for the replies. I currently in talks with a therapist about taking antidepressants. For the mean time I have found that if when I wake up from a nap and just immediately get out of bed and go into the other room. It helps alleviate the "depressional" fall out that would normally follow.

I live alone and I'm just wasting away my time here. It's actually making me very depressed to be honest. I do live in the city which makes think there ought to be at least something to do out here. Though I can't really afford to spent money on it every day.

So unless it's like a one time purchase or if the costs are actually that low. What do you think I should do?