Sometimes the preparation to the meditation - that is, reminding of the four guidelines, going through the six points, and easing attention from the periphery, sounds, body sensations, breath sensations in totality, and the sensations at the tip of the nose - feels slippery.
I can't hold onto the preparation and I find myself already with the breath at the tip of the nose when going through the six points, like the breath is already at the background, or maybe even the preparation is at the background, not sure.
Speak up publicly. Did you use your own real name in the support letter? You should.