this post was submitted on 09 Apr 2024
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Funny

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[–] ivanafterall@kbin.social 81 points 2 years ago (4 children)

Sacrificing me isn't sleeping though, which is what you said you wanted? I'm sensing some dishonesty, which is a red flag for me.

[–] PCChipsM922U@sh.itjust.works 16 points 2 years ago* (last edited 2 years ago)

You sure? IDK man, you know, you could be sleeping while she slits your throat.

She seems honest IMO.

[–] Steamymoomilk@sh.itjust.works 6 points 2 years ago

Nah you just picky mate,

[–] idunnololz@lemmy.world 2 points 2 years ago

DW all flags will be red after she bathes the world in your blood.

[–] Daft_ish@lemmy.world 2 points 2 years ago

Red flag, but not a deal breaker.

[–] dmMeYourNudes@lemmynsfw.com 69 points 2 years ago
[–] Ilovethebomb@lemm.ee 44 points 2 years ago* (last edited 2 years ago) (2 children)

These "quirky" bios are a dime a dozen on swipe dating platforms.

Don't bother with them, they're not taking things seriously, and aren't actually interested in you, just there to stroke their ego.

[–] hydroptic@sopuli.xyz 19 points 2 years ago* (last edited 2 years ago) (2 children)

they’re not taking things seriously

No shit?

just there to stroke your ego.

… this is such an odd leap of reasoning that I have a feeling you have personal story somewhere in there

[–] Ilovethebomb@lemm.ee 19 points 2 years ago (1 children)
[–] hydroptic@sopuli.xyz 6 points 2 years ago (1 children)

Ahh right that definitely makes more sense, although I'm not sure I agree

[–] Ilovethebomb@lemm.ee 7 points 2 years ago (2 children)

I learnt this through experience, take my word for it. They're not worth your time.

[–] r00ty@kbin.life 8 points 2 years ago

1/10, would not be a human sacrifice again?

[–] hydroptic@sopuli.xyz 0 points 2 years ago* (last edited 2 years ago)

Weeelll, you have personal experience from what I'm assuming is at most a couple of different "cases", plus it's not like we know whether your interpretation of what was going on reflects what happened. Not that I'm saying you're lying or necessarily even incorrect, mind you, just that taking random people at their word is often inadvisable.

Not that it makes much of a difference to me personally anyhow, it's not like I have any intention of using Tinder. Never had any good experiences with it when I did try it a few years ago

[–] PCChipsM922U@sh.itjust.works 6 points 2 years ago

Yeah, like how is that strokingmy ego 🤔...

[–] interdimensionalmeme@lemmy.ml 14 points 2 years ago (1 children)

My sacrifice to the dark one unfulfilled, 1/10, good sex though.

[–] JoShmoe@ani.social 2 points 2 years ago

The bios says no sex.

[–] Rolando@lemmy.world 37 points 2 years ago (1 children)

"...sacrifice your worthless life to the dark overlord"?? If my life is worthless, then it's not really a sacrifice, is it? Please do better, "Danielle, 19".

[–] PCChipsM922U@sh.itjust.works 2 points 2 years ago* (last edited 2 years ago)

Wanna find out? Only 6km away 😊.

[–] JimboDHimbo@lemmy.ca 35 points 2 years ago

Fix what? There's nothing to fix.

[–] SomeGuy69@lemmy.world 16 points 2 years ago

The no sex part is a bit disappointing, I'd expect more for my blood sacrifice.

[–] Rascabin@lemmy.ml 14 points 2 years ago (4 children)
[–] kautau@lemmy.world 26 points 2 years ago

refreshes

5 Kilometers away

[–] sukhmel@programming.dev 10 points 2 years ago

And decreasing…

[–] aeronmelon@lemmy.world 2 points 2 years ago

TIME TO SELL THE HOUSE!

[–] PCChipsM922U@sh.itjust.works 1 points 2 years ago (1 children)
[–] Manzas 5 points 2 years ago
[–] fckreddit@lemmy.ml 13 points 2 years ago

Fine… Just make sure it doesn’t hurt too much.

[–] Fal@yiffit.net 9 points 2 years ago (1 children)
[–] remotelove@lemmy.ca 6 points 2 years ago

Those fake eyebrows, for starters.

[–] slazer2au@lemmy.world 8 points 2 years ago (1 children)
[–] PCChipsM922U@sh.itjust.works 3 points 2 years ago

Amd as you take your last bloody breayhs, she pulls out the strapon.

[–] RIP_Cheems@lemmy.world 5 points 2 years ago (1 children)

Had me in the first half, not gonna lie.

[–] PCChipsM922U@sh.itjust.works 1 points 2 years ago

Yeah, I was hoping for stroking maybe...

[–] TrickDacy@lemmy.world 4 points 2 years ago (1 children)

Where is there humor here?

[–] SirQuackTheDuck@lemmy.world 3 points 2 years ago

The humour is in the sweet releasing embrace of death

[–] deadbeef79000@lemmy.nz 3 points 2 years ago (1 children)

Ooh, she might cut herself with that edge.

[–] Shou@lemmy.world 2 points 2 years ago

I thought the point was to cut her date with it.

[–] Daft_ish@lemmy.world 2 points 2 years ago

And only 6 kms away!

[–] AgentGrimstone@lemmy.world 1 points 2 years ago (1 children)
[–] PCChipsM922U@sh.itjust.works 1 points 2 years ago

Fairly soon... she's only 6km away.