this post was submitted on 01 May 2026
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Greentext

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This is a place to share greentexts and witness the confounding life of Anon. If you're new to the Greentext community, think of it as a sort of zoo with Anon as the main attraction.

Be warned:

If you find yourself getting angry (or god forbid, agreeing) with something Anon has said, you might be doing it wrong.

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[–] orenj@leminal.space 10 points 1 day ago

aaw. I hope that this greentext in particular was real.

[–] DaleGribble88@programming.dev 21 points 1 day ago (2 children)

I prefer Gordon Ramsey's content outside of the US better because he is often less angry for angriness sake, and often because someone is doing something that will get someone sick or hurt. To me, that is what healthy anger looks like. An alert system that drives you to make changes and demand changes of others for the benefit and safety of everyone.

That probably isn't worded the best, and I am no philosopher or psychiatrist, but it is a worldview that has been healthy and helpful for me.

[–] fibojoly@sh.itjust.works 8 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Nah that's spot on. He gets angry to see stupid shit and he isn't afraid to let people know because it does have consequences. Don't be a donkey and he's sound as fuck, I reckon.

But of course good TV means they'll put quite the muppets on his path, for drama.

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[–] SirEDCaLot@lemmy.today 8 points 1 day ago

100%. The kitchen nightmares UK version was way way way better because it wasn't overproduced and dramaed up, it was focused on the food and the restaurant which is way more interesting to me than a bunch of idiots yelling at each other.

[–] Etterra@discuss.online 4 points 1 day ago

Plausible green text 👍

[–] sp3ctr4l@lemmy.dbzer0.com 18 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago) (3 children)

I will keep saying this:

Socioeconomically disadvantaged young dudes are angry.

Instead of broadly shaming them for that, relate to that anger, temper it, show them how to use it in a controlled manner, and point it toward something useful, constructive.

Give them a rules-based, defined, productive outlet for it.

If you just tell them to bottle it up... they will eventually explode, and cause collateral damage.

How sad is it that a goofily angry man on the TV is a better parent than anon's parents?

Well, it doesn't matter how sad it is, because most parents these days are working too many jobs for not enough money, to even possibly be decent parents.

Thats just reality.

... You wanna beat the fascists at their game of weaponizing male insecurity and angst?

Provide a better version of channeling that insecurity and angst: Give them a framework for thinking and acting that they can channel the anger and energy into genuienly useful and productive forms.

Actually show them a positive, socially beneficial form of masculinity, that gives them their own identity, instead of a cultic group identity.

[–] Flower@sh.itjust.works 6 points 1 day ago (1 children)

How sad is it that a goofily angry man on the TV is a better parent than anon’s parents?

Some even say Star Trek TNG characters were their role models because it were the first adults actually acting as adults they were exposed to.

[–] sp3ctr4l@lemmy.dbzer0.com 1 points 1 day ago

I mean, beyond Mr. Rogers, yeah I absolutely can see that.

[–] Juice@midwest.social 7 points 2 days ago* (last edited 1 day ago) (4 children)

beat the fascists

The people telling boys to bottle up their emotions are the fascists. I don't mean that everyone who has said this is ideologically fascist, but that's a practice that, like you said, it only causes problems in society. The fascist impulse, the Hitler particle exists inside a lot of regular people and is reinforced by our social institutions especially the exploiting workplace.

There is a larger cultural issue at play here, but culture is dependent on the economic factors, and vice-versa

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[–] HorreC@lemmy.world 37 points 2 days ago (5 children)

I find it soooo weird that people say cooking is a womans job (it should just be who ever likes cooking job), but in most parts of the world, men are dominantly the people who do the cooking in professional and home environments. I love cooking and my partner loves the chemistry of baking, else we would just have a cabinet of craft dinners and ramen (not that we dont have those on hand).

[–] F_State@midwest.social 3 points 1 day ago

My mom didn't start to learn how to cook till she was in her 40s and that was like a hobby.

[–] TubularTittyFrog@lemmy.world 4 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago) (2 children)

i've never dated a woman my entire life who didn't look down on me for cooking. even if she herself couldn't cook.

cultural beliefs are everything to many folks.

to them cooking and cleaning is for lower class people, if it's not women it should be hired help who are immigrants.

[–] HorreC@lemmy.world 1 points 1 day ago

that is super fucked up, like no matter the amount of money I have made even when I had people in the house that could cook for me, I was still like no let me cook for me and my partner.

[–] mfed1122@discuss.tchncs.de 3 points 1 day ago (1 children)

That's fascinating! I'm in America and most women seem to like that I (male) do the cooking. Do you mind me asking what culture you're a part of here?

[–] TubularTittyFrog@lemmy.world 2 points 23 hours ago* (last edited 23 hours ago)

progressive liberal democratic voting boston. Boston is political liberal but socially conservative.

women here are 2025 in the streets, but 1955 in the sheets.

[–] Signtist@bookwyr.me 5 points 2 days ago (3 children)

Just about all prejudice is just manufactured cultural pressure. There's no base in reality or rationality, it's just "people told me this often enough that now I believe it." It easily shifts from culture to culture because different people said different baseless things that became "common knowledge" in that region.

[–] HorreC@lemmy.world 1 points 1 day ago

the idea of gendered jobs is just some old ass shit. You wanna cook clean and be the one who get drunk at the bar and starts fights, do it, I mean not around me because you sound like a mess, but you dont need tits or a dick to preform most things in life.

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[–] GandalftheBlack@feddit.org 5 points 2 days ago (2 children)

Yeah. I do most of the cooking for me and my girlfriend, and that suits both of us. I like being able to cook what I want, and she likes eating what I cook.

[–] HorreC@lemmy.world 1 points 1 day ago

I always thought it felt kinda good when I would cook a new dish for me and a partner/friends and they enjoyed it. It gave me a small warm fuzzy feeling, I would get pissed if I was not allowed to do that (both the cooking, as I like it, and the fuzzy, again because I like it).

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[–] mfed1122@discuss.tchncs.de 2 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago) (1 children)

It's just another epic sexism moment. Cooking lame garden-variety "food to not die" crap at home to feed the family? That's a woman's job. Doing good, skillful cooking that has intrinsic merit of its own, cooking that deserves money? Oh okay, now men should be doing it. 🙃

This even happens with home cooking, at least it did in my town. The moms cook every night, but when a DAD is grilling some STEAK (ironically a much simpler dish to make), suddenly that's a special event.

[–] HorreC@lemmy.world 1 points 1 day ago

I have seen a lot of that too, where its he grills and she does the inside cooking.

[–] tanisnikana@lemmy.world 44 points 2 days ago (3 children)

Fake: man, how do you even eat a pumpkin?

Gay: me, and also I’m a lesbian that can’t cook so I don’t fucking know

[–] Gnugit@aussie.zone 25 points 2 days ago

I'm a chef so I have professional knowledge on this subject. Gordon is powerful enough to convert any red blooded lesbian into a pumpkin eater.

[–] M137@lemmy.today 3 points 1 day ago

The only pumpkin eating I know about is from the US and a lot of the stuff they eat should be illegal to consume.

[–] Nurse_Robot@lemmy.world 14 points 2 days ago

Fake and gay: pumpkin

[–] FinjaminPoach@lemmy.world 15 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago) (2 children)

Look, it might be fake, but these stories annoy me because the way people are treated by their family influences their behaviour. "For once my family isn't angry with me" - the same story everywhere. NEETs idn't stand a chance

[–] IronBird@lemmy.world 9 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago) (1 children)

fake - annon's family is definitely still disappointed in them

gay - doing things for other people

[–] FinjaminPoach@lemmy.world 9 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago)

Gay: anon likes Gordon Ramsay

Double Gay: anon cooks

Fake: anon's family isn't angry or disappointed

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[–] marduk@lemmy.today 16 points 2 days ago (21 children)

I make my scrambled eggs the way he does

I, too, yell, "Fuck off, you donkey" at the egg carton until the eggs come out.

[–] No1@aussie.zone 2 points 1 day ago

Fake: eggs you eat where you can't identify the yolk.
Gay: adding creme fraiche to anything, or even having it in your fridge

[–] jaybone@lemmy.zip 8 points 2 days ago

The secret trick is to scramble them.

[–] codexarcanum@lemmy.dbzer0.com 5 points 2 days ago

I tried his way a few times, did pickup some better technique for stirring, but mostly I still like mine how I've always made them. Have you seen the video of his (adult) son telling him that he likes his eggs different? I laughed pretty hard because it's exactly how i feel. "Yeah it's good but it takes 15 minutes!" Gordon being a dick about the pan too is just so on brand.

[–] NottaLottaOcelot@lemmy.ca 5 points 2 days ago

His voice demonstrating that on TV is always on my mind when making scrambled eggs.

Never stop stirring. Never stop! NEVER STOP!

[–] SkaveRat@discuss.tchncs.de 3 points 2 days ago

I always make my grilled cheese sandwich the way he does

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[–] peetabix@sh.itjust.works 3 points 1 day ago (1 children)

I remember when Jamie Oliver first started his Naked Chef series in the UK. He was getting a load of hate from guys because their girlfriends/wives expected them to do their share of cooking. They used to shout at him in the street.

[–] NigelFrobisher@aussie.zone 2 points 1 day ago

There was an entire Jamie Oliver hate site and forum. Good times.

[–] tgcoldrockn@lemmy.world 2 points 1 day ago

Studio Ramsay bots astroturfing 4chan is the 21st century we wanted.

[–] lvxferre@mander.xyz 7 points 2 days ago (1 children)

I found the recipe! Might try my hand at it, it's Autumn here and the recipe looks good. (I might end using butternut squash instead though.)

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[–] rustyfish@piefed.world 6 points 2 days ago

Pumpkin soup fucking slaps!

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