this post was submitted on 23 Mar 2026
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Showerthoughts

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A "Showerthought" is a simple term used to describe the thoughts that pop into your head while you're doing everyday things like taking a shower, driving, or just daydreaming. The most popular seem to be lighthearted clever little truths, hidden in daily life.

Here are some examples to inspire your own showerthoughts:

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for context an NPS score is basically the answer to a single question about how likely you are to recommend a service or product to someone else, it's used in marketing to gauge the success of said product or service.

So let my start by saying, this is admittedly a very dark thought and is going to expose some of my pathological thinking, but hear me out:

I'm a very insecure woman, so I completely understand the women who post selfies on subreddits like /r/truerateme and want to know what their "score" is. This is admittedly a very toxic practice that elevates the opinions of toxic men's opinions, because of the insecurity, we refuse to accept positive feedback and that leads to thinking the negative feedback is somehow more objective or true.

Anyway, in the world of Tinder where people are actually out there getting accepted or rejected, I can't help but wonder why society hasn't implemented some kind of NPS score for humans. Credit reporting companies do this with a credit score, I guess - but I was thinking more about how attractive someone is, or how valuable they are on a "dating market".

Tinder could easily expand a profile to include metrics, like Airbnb or Uber does with ratings. It seems like an inevitable progression of the way our society views and treats relationships and dating as transactional and marketized. (And in a sense this is what happened with the Tea app, though that was more like a safety tool for women, it still created a context in which men in particular were rated based on how previous dates went.)

Maybe Materialists is just stuck in my brain, but I am genuinely surprised the feature doesn't already exist (or does it and I don't know - I've never been on a dating app).

Another way this idea is human-NPS-score idea is super toxic is that it assumes attraction or tastes are objective - that someone is only attractive or valuable in some objective sense that anyone can see or that there is social consensus about.

Instead the reality is that how attractive someone is varies incredibly on an individual basis, but even between cultures (and over time).

Still, maybe I'm just broken, but I think I would pay money to know what my human NPS score is.

(Probably it would be worsened by this post, tbh. I shouldn't have written this. I don't know what's wrong with me.)

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[–] Cevilia@lemmy.blahaj.zone 4 points 7 hours ago (1 children)

Net Promoter Score is a garbage metric that exists to deny hard workers bonuses.

You can rank someone 6/10 (above average) and that counts against them?!

[–] dandelion@lemmy.blahaj.zone 1 points 2 hours ago

yeah, and a NPS score for humans would be even worse tbh

[–] kbal@fedia.io 11 points 19 hours ago (1 children)

It's because we don't yet live in actual hell, it just seems that way sometimes.

[–] dandelion@lemmy.blahaj.zone 3 points 19 hours ago* (last edited 19 hours ago) (2 children)

yes, I guess this is a bit too much like that Black Mirror episode, Nosedive

(I give you five stars for this comment: ★★★★★)

[–] FreshParsnip@lemmy.ca 1 points 14 hours ago

I was going to mention Nosedive too

[–] mrnobody@reddthat.com 1 points 18 hours ago (1 children)

Lmao, I was going to comment about Black Mirror.

I fell like it'd be a mix of LinkedIn and yelp, where people stop only to leave bad reviews, or humble brag on themselves, exaggerating, kissing ass, and being more fake than most are already being in regular social media.

It's a slippery slope, that in theory could be productive, but knowing how companies are, already, with data, NO THANKS! It would be more toxic than Meta & AI combined!

[–] dandelion@lemmy.blahaj.zone 0 points 18 hours ago (1 children)

oh yeah, it would be super toxic and probably not even helpful for getting a sense of your "social consensus value"

but I admit I'm so insecure I can't help but wonder if I'm a 4/10 🙃

[–] mrnobody@reddthat.com 1 points 4 hours ago

The fact you're being brutally honest here and vulnerable, even though anonymous, still says a lot about a person. It's commendable! It's its own kind of beauty right there.

The other big issue with dating apps are pictures front and center. So if you don't photograph well, or have the right picture to get the right attention from people, you're almost completely hopeless. It's almost impossible not to be shallow focusing all of your "first impression" on milliseconds as users swipe away.

Best of luck, and if you crack the code to NPS for people, you'll be rich! Haha

[–] Thedogdrinkscoffee@lemmy.ca 4 points 18 hours ago (1 children)

China's social credit system intensifies.

[–] dandelion@lemmy.blahaj.zone 1 points 18 hours ago

don't you want to know if you're a good citizen!? 😭

(admittedly I based my sense of self-worth on my grades)

[–] surewhynotlem@lemmy.world 2 points 17 hours ago (1 children)

I'm a very insecure woman, ... want to know what their "score" is.

You're an 11/10. A goddess among the plebes. And you need to stop caring about other people's opinions.

Opinions are like assholes. Everyone has one and most of them stink. Once you realize that other people's judgement is poor, you'll be much happier.

[–] dandelion@lemmy.blahaj.zone 1 points 12 hours ago

yeah, I don't think that makes too much sense - we're social creatures, we probably should care about what other people think

I admit my insecurities are unhealthy, and the way I'm approaching my insecurities is unhealthy, but I don't think the right conclusion is to think I'm a goddess or a 11/10, nor to completely ignore everyone's opinions of me.

And besides, part of the reason I feel insecure is because of the feedback I get from society - I'm pretty sure based on the way people treat me that I'm not attractive, etc. - so in some sense I just want confirmation of what my lived experience is already telling me

[–] BorgDrone@feddit.nl 2 points 18 hours ago (1 children)

Because you can’t reduce a human to a single scalar.

[–] dandelion@lemmy.blahaj.zone 0 points 18 hours ago

you get one star for saying that: ★☆☆☆☆

[–] OriginEnergySux@lemmy.world 2 points 19 hours ago (1 children)

oof please stop talking about this in case someone actually does this. Then again it sounds like it would make money so probs not far off

[–] dandelion@lemmy.blahaj.zone 1 points 18 hours ago (1 children)

it does seem like one of those horrible, but monetize-able, ideas that I can hardly believe hasn't been introduced already

[–] OriginEnergySux@lemmy.world 1 points 17 hours ago (1 children)

this has Enshittification written all over it

[–] dandelion@lemmy.blahaj.zone 2 points 14 hours ago

exactly, it is so enshittified - and I'm not surprised Tinder already had this system on their backend (a hidden ELO score), that's so scummy

[–] sad_detective_man@sopuli.xyz 1 points 18 hours ago* (last edited 18 hours ago) (1 children)

Wait did you not know Tinder has a literal ELO ranking?

It's one of the many reasons why it's so shit

[–] dandelion@lemmy.blahaj.zone 1 points 17 hours ago (1 children)

no, I didn't know about that - but hey, now I know at least I can upload my photos to Tinder and see how attractive Tinder thinks I am 😅

[–] sad_detective_man@sopuli.xyz 3 points 17 hours ago* (last edited 17 hours ago)

Sort of. You're not supposed to be able to see Elo. If you're a woman seeking men you'll get a rough idea based on the attractiveness of the men you're shown after a few days. If You're a man seeking women then you'll know if you're ugly based on the amount of fake profiles you're shown. If you're a woman seeking women on Tinder, well my condolences.