this post was submitted on 10 Dec 2025
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The Monkey's Paw

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[–] DahGangalang@infosec.pub 10 points 3 months ago (2 children)

Granted. Their butt cheeks swell while needing to poop, but don't shrink after pooping. You can now tell who has held in their poops for longer periods of time on their life from their swollen buttocks.

[–] RaoulDook@lemmy.world 12 points 3 months ago

Sir Mix-A-Lot is really gonna be in his element

[–] SanctimoniousApe@lemmings.world 4 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago)

J-Lo finally has some competition!

[–] WhyIHateTheInternet@lemmy.world 3 points 3 months ago

Granted. Now their butts are too big to use the toilet and pooping outside is the only viable option and the world is now covered in shit.

The large intestine is now in the buttocks. Sitting for too long will cause obstruction. Falling on your ass has a good chance of causing defecation.

[–] 4am@lemmy.zip 3 points 3 months ago

I’ll never look at Sabrina Carpenter the same way again

[–] njm1314@lemmy.world 2 points 3 months ago

Yours doesn't?