Ask

Physical disability both gave me infinite time and made me realize that, when I had this same perspective, it was my cluttered mind and self expectations that were and still are the problem.

Do not be hard on yourself for the things you do not finish or when you lack the motivation to complete something. It is okay to do projects as a form of therapy and to walk away from them at any point that you are no longer getting value from them.

There was a Linux conference years ago where the speaker talked about her human byte, aka what one could process and hold in memory at one time. This memory is finite, and it is okay to acknowledge that. Some people excel at expanding their human byte through organizational skills, others may simply have an extraordinary size or persistence. We are not all equal. Mine is about average, if not a little small. I have something like an abstracted secondary space in my head for very loose note taking, but my actual persistence within any given main project focus is only around 3 weeks before my motivations drastically fade. Many times I learn whatever thing I was really interested in long before the project is complete and never finish it. I have learned to not let that bother me. I was an automotive painter early in life. That job is all about defeating self expectations for time spent because perfection is not subject to an individual's emotions or ego. So I have no doubts about what I am actually capable of doing if I really care. Like I said, there are many more reasons for exploring one's interests than simply finishing projects.

The psychology of this abstract space holds meaning far beyond first appearances. Do not hold back your self growth. That suppression is likely the underlying tension you are expressing. If you do not release this tension productively, you may regret the results that manifest as cognitive dissonance. The all or nothing premise is a fallacy that merits interpersonal exploration. In the past, I was blind to this as a fallacy. I'm not even sure if my explanation here would resonate with myself in the past, but hopefully it helps.

I do it very slowly, often over the course of weeks. If it's something like a cooking project for example, I'll spend one week gathering ingredients, typically one weekend experimenting, and another weekend on making a finished project. If it's a craft project like the gas mask I'm working on, it might take me several months working a few hours a weekend at a time. I find the easiest way to avoid getting overwhelmed is to move at my own pace. I also allow myself to have different types of projects ongoing at once, but crucially only one of each type. In other words, I can have a computer project, a cooking project, and a craft project, but not three different cooking projects.

Having a physical separation of where I “work” and where I spend time on hobbies is the main thing that helps me. That and dedicating a fixed amount of time in a day to one specific thing. I find that having a strict time commitment for one thing allows me to plan the rest of the day accordingly instead of becoming overwhelmed by thinking of all the things that need to be done without having a starting point.

It’s also ok to put hobbies on hold if you have more urgent matters that need your full attention. Setbacks are a part of life. Picking up after a break is better than not even having started.

Detach, Prioritize, and then face the fact you have to become a little selfish or self-involved to bring projects to fruition, even if only for small bursts. If you pursue your passions professionally, you find ways to systematize and compartmentalize. I may be mentally ill but I never warmed to the hobby approach to my skill-sets. I just always went all in.

If it’s important to you, make hobby time a priority as part of your mental health self care routine. Even if it’s only an hour a week, that’s still progress that’s being made when you have the time to make it. Making both putting down and picking up a project a habit will help take the “I have to finish it!” pressure off you while you’re enjoying your hobby. I’m assuming you have at least 1 free hour a week, and if not I feel for you.

Not something I've really mastered myself. With ADHD I tend to throw myself into hobbies regardless of real obligations. I can share from an outside perspective is that the key is planning and scheduling. Having a designated hobby time and hobby space can be a real help. Even putting in 2 hours a week you'll still be able to progress on projects without putting a huge demand on your time. Just block out the time with alarms or a calendar and dedicate that time to your hobby.