That's some fucked up capitalization in the title.
this post was submitted on 22 Sep 2025
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... why is the T capitalized?
Because they are not lord of all rings, only of THE rings.
OP has it wrong: the story of the Silmarillion can instead be summed up as:
Be he foe or friend, be he foul or clean
Brood of Morgoth or bright Vala,
Elda or Maia or Aftercomer,
Man yet unborn upon Middle-earth,
Neither law, nor love, nor league of swords,
Dread nor danger, not Doom itself
Shall defend him from Fëanáro, and Fëanáro’s kin,
Whoso hideth or hoardeth, or in hand taketh,
Finding keepeth or afar casteth
A Silmaril. This swear we all…
Death we will deal him ere Day’s ending,
Woe unto world’s end! Our word hear thou,
Eru Allfather! To the everlasting Darkness doom us if our deed faileth…
On the holy mountain hear in witness
and our vow remember,
Manwë and Varda!"
Noooo, now you're bound by the Oath! You gotta quit having fun, spend far too much time at the forge with your brothers and be consumed by vengeance!
As someone who has not (yet) read the Silmarillion, what are the three pieces of good?
Feanor, one of the OG elves, made three jewels called the Silmarils. All you need to know about Feanor is that he did nothing wrong.
We're just going to forget the Oath and everything that it led to. Nothing bad happened at Alqualondë, right?
It was a special military operation that was only supposed to take 3 days ....
The Teleri were asking for it.
(Just in case, here is the /s. It’s fun to be a Noldorian loyalist in LOTR fan groups though)
3 super jewels that held the light of sacred trees, trees later destroyed and defiled by Morgoth's minion. The minion teabagged them.
If you have trouble getting into it when you do read it, consider an audio book. Hearing the names and places instead of trying to figure them out makes it a bit easier to pay attention to the actual story.
Plus, Andy Serkis narrates one version!
There is a podcast called LotR lore cast which goes through the whole story and breaks it down. It is really helpful in keeping track of everything.
Good point, here. It's marvelous for listening
Imagine a 80 minute animated film of just Beren sneaking into Angbad and stealing the silmaril from Morgoth's crown.