this post was submitted on 22 May 2025

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UPDATED! Mutual_Aid discussion post (hexbear.net)

submitted 2 months ago* (last edited 1 month ago) by CARCOSA@hexbear.net to c/hexbear@hexbear.net

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After discussing this with the people most often using the mutual aid community and feedback here we will be making a single change.

Meta posts will no longer be permitted in !mutual_aid@hexbear.net critical meta posts must not be about specific users and posted in !feedback@hexbear.net at risk of removal.

We will change the mutual aid sidebar to remove the clause permitting meta posts, we will also ask that users post once a day so that everyone's post's can be seen but this is not a hard rule as it is pretty clear that removing posts is a last resort in that community. This joins the other community recommendations that users include currency, how much is needed, updating when a user has received funds, or updating/locking the post when the need has been met.

This will be unfeatured in about 12 hours

~~Hello users of hexbear:

Due to recent meta posts in our mutual aid community we wanted to open up discussion about the community !mutual_aid@hexbear.net

We will never require explanation or justification from a user asking for aid in the community, and the mod and admin team continue to commit to not featuring an individual's mutual aid request to prevent unfair exposure.

In addition, we will maintain a strict "No critical comments or meta comments" on a mutual aid post.

This post is to discuss the mutual aid community's rule of allowing meta posts: mutual aid as a community, those making posts in it and those commenting on posts.

We are considering removing the exception allowing meta posts but wanted to involve the userbase before committing to a change.

Please comment with any thoughts, feelings, or suggestions regarding this change.

Thank you~~

(page 3) 50 comments

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[–] gaystyleJoker@hexbear.net 12 points 2 months ago

i think maybe it would help if people knew when donation goals were being met. like if we had a basic verification system that kind of worked on the honor system it might help. something like this:

user posts request with amount,
donator comments something like "DM Sent",
user updates after amount is received

i can think of a few issues so far:

some people lurk/donate without posting
there may be opsec issues we could fix by encouraging donator alts
it may deincentivize people from donating to those who aren't using the system

i'd like some input on how to fix the issues because i do think we can fix the transparency issues and make people more confident donating

[–] leftAF@hexbear.net 11 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

I think it's fine as-is.

The WWW is plenty big. There's risks in everything. My risks when donating make paypal a nonstarter, worst case for me is probably someone unfortunately winding up in a situation that makes the cops look at me. I don't want that. Monero and a venmo account I've acquired which can be funded anonymously.

[–] allthetimesivedied@hexbear.net 10 points 2 months ago

I like how, no matter how many times I say that I didn’t blow all that money on drugs, that I don’t spend all the money I receive on drugs, this shit just persists and persists.

Nobody was honest with me when I posted threads asking if everything was alright, because it seemed like something was up.

[–] Acute_Engles@hexbear.net 10 points 2 months ago

I don't know what any of this is in reference to but it seems pretty strange to be worried about the chain of custody of money you give to someone on here but not give 2 shits about BDS or where the corporation you work for spends the product of your labor...

Why are beggars held to a higher standard than capitalists?

[–] SorosFootSoldier@hexbear.net 9 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Honestly looking back over this thread makes me afraid to even ask for aid anymore. I had no idea it was this much of an issue simmering under the surface and that worries the fuck out of me because I rely on this place to keep myself fed. It honestly feels like fixing something that wasn't broken.

[–] CARCOSA@hexbear.net 9 points 2 months ago

the community has ebbed and flowed with the amount of use and understandably so it is being used more than in the past. the intent of the changes is to try and reduce barriers to those posting in the community and make it more fair for all posters. this is a follow up to the change we made no longer site pinning individual mutual aid posts and dealing with the increasing amount of meta-posting regarding the community and those that use it.

[–] Moss@hexbear.net 8 points 2 months ago

What benefit is there to allowing meta posts? The description of mutual aid should be changed to reflect that it is mainly used for fundraising, but if you don't or can't contribute, just unsubscribe or block the comm.

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