this post was submitted on 17 Oct 2024
453 points (98.1% liked)

The Onion

6802 readers
580 users here now

The Onion

A place to share and discuss stories from The Onion, Clickhole, and other satire.

Great Satire Writing:

founded 3 years ago
MODERATORS
top 19 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[–] Linktank@lemmy.today 76 points 1 year ago (2 children)

Wow, this onion went down way too easily. I was fully ready to believe it.

[–] Zikeji@programming.dev 27 points 1 year ago

This is the first time I actually did a double take at an onion article lol. It got me good too.

[–] aeronmelon@lemmy.world 2 points 1 year ago

Sometimes we eat the onion long before it arrives.

[–] InverseParallax@lemmy.world 72 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (1 children)

Terrible attempt at satire, completely unbelievable.

Why would Trump ever worry about the law?

[–] Serinus@lemmy.world 4 points 1 year ago

He can't order anyone to force her until he's crowned by the Supreme Court.

Then he'll make it an Official Act.

[–] fizzyvelcro@lemmy.world 36 points 1 year ago (2 children)

It's an 18th century law. Her knowing is irrelevant to him.

[–] InverseParallax@lemmy.world 2 points 1 year ago

Shh, don't spoil the surprise!

[–] stinerman@midwest.social 31 points 1 year ago (2 children)

To be clear, he doesn't want to marry his daughter. He wants to fuck her.

[–] datelmd5sum@lemmy.world 2 points 1 year ago (1 children)
[–] jaggedrobotpubes@lemmy.world 13 points 1 year ago (1 children)
[–] Valmond@lemmy.world 3 points 1 year ago

Wow that was dark, thanks for the laugh!

[–] Delphia@lemmy.world 1 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

Great, now he and I have something in common.

Edit: her looks are about the least offensive thing about her, sorry. The terrible person is pretty hot. If it helps I'll wipe my dick on the curtains and give her a fake number.

[–] HawlSera@lemm.ee 24 points 1 year ago (1 children)

It's sad that I actually needed to check to see if this was an Onion article or not

[–] whydudothatdrcrane@lemmy.ml 5 points 1 year ago

Reads the title

Goes WTF

Goes back to reread the title in moderate disbelief

Notices the website is theonion

Fuck you onion, you almost had me the first time around!

[–] Machinist@lemmy.world 12 points 1 year ago

Had me for a second until I realized that he wouldn't know 18th-century law.

[–] CPMSP@midwest.social 11 points 1 year ago

I mean in his defense... This is an onion article after all. It's only mostly believable.

[–] betahack@lemmy.world 8 points 1 year ago

don't tell him about prima nocta....NO PRIMA NOCTA!!!

[–] ohellidk@sh.itjust.works 6 points 1 year ago

wow, almost had me again!