this post was submitted on 16 Mar 2024
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I have a young gay friend who is at their wits end trying to find others in their community. They are, understandably, reluctant to use the Internet for this purpose. We live in a very rural and conservative part of America.

If you have any practical guidance for them then, please let me know. I will be very happy to pass it along to them.

Thank you.

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[–] survivalmachine@beehaw.org 9 points 9 months ago

My advice would be;; stop looking for a relationship. Tell your friend to look for things to do and places to be, situations and projects to enjoy. Put themselves into the situations they can have happiness and fun. The rest will follow. Tell them to find hobbies, be it bowling, gun range, ATVing, etc... something, anything that gets them out and around other people.

This. I finally just gave up on seeking relationships altogether several years ago when i was still living in rural America and figured I would focus on being a spinster and just enjoying myself. Several pool leagues and bowling teams later, and a few really great temporary relationships, I ran into my person, who also was decidedly done with the whole dating scene themselves. We've now been a happy couple for several years now.