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submitted 11 months ago by blakeus12@hexbear.net to c/askchapo@hexbear.net

Title. I am kinda wary of this because i don't want to misgender anyone but I am not sure how to refer to those who you don't know the preferred pronouns of? TIA, comrades!

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[-] Timberknave@hexbear.net 6 points 11 months ago

Generally yeah, but it can come across as degendering, especially if the person was made their pronouns visible before. Degendering can be a very painful experience and is almost a textbook case of microaggressions. Better to just ask. Everybody should ask pronouns pretty much right away tbh, since it's the only correct way to not accidentially misgender or to conflate presentation and gender.

But if the typical liberal who would never ask about pronouns ignores my femme presentation and just corrects away from assuming my gender correctly to a stilted gender neutral word they clearly dont use like that often, it still stings, bc it tells me I have been clocked (also I have intense dyspraxia and knowing I fucked up make-up or voice mixes in with gender dysphoria)

this post was submitted on 04 Dec 2023
37 points (100.0% liked)

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