this post was submitted on 06 Oct 2026
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[–] electric_nan@lemmy.ml 101 points 2 days ago (4 children)

Don't spy on your users. Sure, you'll happen to see something once in awhile or when troubleshooting, but don't go looking. It's bad for you and for them.

[–] Malica@lemmy.zip 3 points 10 hours ago

I agree that's looking for conflict

[–] JohnnyCanuck@lemmy.ca 30 points 1 day ago (1 children)

I don't know why people are downvoting you. I stopped using my friend's server when I realized he was watching everything we were doing. Really weirded me out.

[–] lemmyvore@feddit.nl 3 points 18 hours ago

That's the tricky part about self-hosting and it doesn't get addressed enough. There are virtually zero apps designed with user privacy in mind.

[–] PetteriPano@lemmy.world 4 points 1 day ago

I mostly check if my SIL is watching anything before rebooting & updating. Otherwise my wife will stick her head in two minutes later to ask if jellyfin is down.

[–] RonnyZittledong@lemmy.world 1 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago) (2 children)

Watching what my friends and family do is THE ONLY payment I get for doing all this shit. I like to see that they are enjoying all the work I put into it. Its not like I am selling their usage to fucking advertisers or something.

[–] Sibbo@sopuli.xyz 19 points 2 days ago (1 children)

And they know you are watching them?

[–] RonnyZittledong@lemmy.world 13 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago) (1 children)

Yeah. I openly talk to them about it all the time. The fact that watching my friends and family's usage on my free service that I provide for them is somehow controversial is wild...

[–] tea@lemmy.today 27 points 2 days ago (1 children)

Just know you might be making them uncomfortable. I'm sure they have no expectation of privacy, but don't go out of your way to check on them, and don't call them out on their viewing habits. I have friends whom are uncomfortable as it is using my homelab because they are afraid of being judged. I'd echo the others here, don't spy on your users...

[–] RonnyZittledong@lemmy.world 10 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago) (3 children)

I don't call them out and never said that I did. I am sure my friend since the 3rd grade, my brother or my mother will be shocked at my behavior.

[–] lka1988@lemmy.dbzer0.com 1 points 11 hours ago* (last edited 11 hours ago)

I am sure my friend since the 3rd grade, my brother or my mother will be shocked at my behavior.

You'd be surprised. People get very antsy when it comes to what they think is a private thing. You're absolutely allowed to look at it, but understand that watching everything your users do is essentially traveling down the exact same road we are trying to avoid with big tech - watching, monitoring, and analyzing our data.

[–] tea@lemmy.today 8 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago)

I openly talk to them about it all the time.

I guess I was responding to this along with the content of your post.

I just don't talk about it and make it a point not to. I talk about what I'm watching. I talk about that my friends have requested shows/movies on the server that I ended up enjoying as well. I never talk about what they are watching or not watching.

I'm sorry if I got the wrong impression from your comments and post, but I just got the sense that you maybe brought up with them that you were sad that your friend didn't finish your favorite movie. If I were a friend with whom that was brought up with, I would think twice about what I pulled up on your server. That shows to me that my behavior is being watched and monitored, which isn't a great feeling, free service provided by a friend or not. Again, sorry if that's not the case here and you can disregard entirely, but this is just not how I talk to the friends and family about using my Jellyfin server.

[–] Serinus@lemmy.world 3 points 1 day ago (1 children)

It's not terrible. I would do the same as you before reading this post, and maybe I would after. I do think they have a point, though.

Mostly I'd watch it to see if it's being used or not.

Maybe Jellyfin could come out with an option to make things semi-anonymous. You'd be able to just click it off, but it wouldn't show you details unless you explicitly asked for them.

On the other hand, I'm very aware that if I were to use someone's Plex that their "payment" would be the satisfaction of seeing their service used. I wouldn't mind the stats they collect, but the fact that they collect them would be at the forefront of my mind.

[–] hereiamagain@sh.itjust.works 4 points 1 day ago

I think you're right. My brother was on someones Plex for awhile once. And one day the owner asked him how he was liking xyz show he was watching.

Innocent enough, but still weirded him out. He stopped using it immediately after that. Doesn't want to be observed, even casually.

[–] electric_nan@lemmy.ml 6 points 2 days ago

I also provide this type of thing for friends and family for free (because I love them), and because payment would make me feel obligated beyond what I feel like doing. It sounds like you've made them aware, which is good. I also tell my friends that I can see what they watch, but that I don't. You do you, but your meme suggested something unhealthy to me.