this post was submitted on 19 Sep 2026
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Hello, this is the official press office for non-deranged Americans and I'm happy to announce our support for Canada's associate membership with the EU. Furthermore I would like to say that the Trump Administration can get fucked. I will now take questions.
Hello, Ivan from the Eastern European Times, I have a question: is Florida man somehow related to Balkan Uncle?
Florida man and Balkan uncle are surprisingly unrelated to each other in any direct way and are instead examples of convergent evolution wherein similar pressures can create similar ecological adaptations which under the right circumstances result in similar aesthetics. Similarly the Pan American Redneck (Which Florida man is a sub species therein) actually represent merged hybrid populations derived from distinct but ancestorally related populations resulting in the Appalachian, Ozark, and California Rednecks. Though it should be noted that Redneck analogues populations are more than capable of interacting without issue as seen with Australians and California Rednecks or when Appalachian Rednecks interacted with Bosnians during the Bosnian war.
distant cousins
We have our suspicions but as of right now the investigation is ongoing.
There's a guy on youtube I watch who has been making this joke that Florida was unlawfully stolen from Serbia this whole time. I'm starting to believe...
With Canada joining, as a North American nation, will it need to rebrand from EU to … what?
Just think of European as the place where the Union has originated. Nothing weird with having hamburgers outside of Hamburg either.
It's like the Eurovision song contest, no rebranding needed.
I hate to bring it up as an example, hate the show etc.
United States of Europe
Lake Europe
Gulf of Europe
The Ivan Drago mountains
Great European and North American Union. Or GENAU for short.
~yes this joke only works in German. No regrets.~
No rebranding needed, that's why they're not becoming a member but an associated member.
Atlantic Union?
Although as a Californian I'm also interested in getting in on this which would not work for that.
If CA is joining I don't see why CA can't as well.
Just need to join Canada.
great britain and northern ireland
european union and canada
When are you going to stop speaking about supporting Canada and do something as a collective about your own country?
How am I individually supposed to do something as a collective? I have the same amount of control over my fellow Americans as you do. If you have some secret trick to make them behave better then I encourage you to utilize it.
The question is to a collective. A lot of you are saying in some form ‘on behalf of Americans…’
You said you’d take questions.
I can imagine how Canadians feel about it. Well I’ve seen their replies to it enough so I don’t have to imagine.
What can you do as an individual? Write to any decent rep to underwrite a national shutdown and find like minded individuals to do the same.
I can guarantee you as a collective will regret doing nothing about Trump if he pulls Canada on.