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The FBI Doubles Down on Easing ‘Bestiality’ Hiring Standards (www.wired.com)

submitted 3 weeks ago* (last edited 3 weeks ago) by Aatube@lemmy.dbzer0.com to c/nottheonion@lemmy.world

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“Why would you even get into bestiality?” he asked. “We’re not into bestiality,” said Patel.

In a further exchange, Patel explained to Senator John Kennedy, the Louisiana Republican, that previously, regulations had barred anyone who engaged in bestiality “on either side of it.”

“Either side of what, the bestiality?” asked Kennedy. “So you disqualified the animal?”

“We have great canines, but we’re not going to disqualify them,” said Patel.

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[–] yakko@feddit.uk 15 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

You're all missing the bigger picture, with FBI agents being placed at polling stations they need this to - say it with me - RAT FUCK THE ELECTION!

[–] brem@lemmy.world 2 points 3 weeks ago* (last edited 3 weeks ago) (1 children)

No troops at polling places is a very important part of the ~~constitution~~ US code If the US government is going to use the FBI as a thumb, it should remember that a hand has 4 fingers.

[–] yakko@feddit.uk 4 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

I'm confused about what you expect to happen?

[–] brem@lemmy.world 2 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

Well, Yakko... that's a very Yakko thing to say.

Ask Wakko, he knows.

[–] yakko@feddit.uk 5 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

Very coy, good job. That would go over great on tiktok, but this is lemmy. You can just talk about attacking cops if you want, you get more points that way too :D

[–] brem@lemmy.world 2 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

I attack with words, not fists or bullets.

[–] yakko@feddit.uk 3 points 3 weeks ago (2 children)

Yet refuse to say what you mean, something's clearly being lost in translation. Could you just sock it to me?

[–] mangaskahn@lemmy.world 5 points 3 weeks ago* (last edited 3 weeks ago) (1 children)

Brem: I'm a psych major! Words are my weapons!

FBI Agent: I'm a FBI Agent. Weapons are my weapons.

[–] brem@lemmy.world 1 points 3 weeks ago

Brem: now there's TWO of us!

[–] reptar@lemmy.world 1 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

A hint:

Dot is cute and Yakko yaks. Wakko packs away the snacks While Bill Clinton plays the sax

[–] yakko@feddit.uk 1 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

I know the lyrics, but contextually here my question was what he expects to happen if the bureau is used for election interference. So it's coming across very much a non-sequitur to me

[–] reptar@lemmy.world 1 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

So it's coming across very much a non-sequitur to me

I think that's all it was

[–] yakko@feddit.uk 2 points 3 weeks ago

People would do that...? Just, vaguely pretend to have a point? On the internet?

I think I need to sit down.