Slop.

Their whole Wikipedia entry is so incredible:

Malcolm is the great-grandson of Carr Collins Sr., founder of the Fidelity Union Life Insurance Company, and grandson of James M. Collins, a Dallas, Texas businessman and politician.[27] In 1997, Malcolm's parents undertook a contentious divorce and custody dispute; the proceedings were characterized by one judge as "extensive, bitter and long-lasting".[28][29] During the divorce, Malcolm was ordered to live at a private boarding school funded by a family trust.[29] The divorce was finalized in 2001.[28] It was discovered in 2021, upon the death of James Collins's wife Dorothy Dann Collins Torbert, that some $29 million had been embezzled from the family trust fund by Barbara Chalmers, the family bookkeeper.[30][31] Reflecting on his childhood, Malcolm noted that he has "no beef with my parents. My childhood was hard, but my adulthood has been easy. Can I say a parent did a bad job if I’m happy with my life today? I don’t think so."[29]

Simone was born in Japan[32] as a self-described "mistake baby" and the only child to a failed polyamorous marriage.[29] At some point in her life, Simone experienced eating disorders that gave her fertility issues.[29]

Marriage and children

The Collinses married after Malcolm proposed on Reddit in 2013.[33][4] They live in Audubon, Pennsylvania.[34]

The Collinses have stated that they plan to have seven to thirteen children total.[1][35] As of 2025, they have five children.[36] The Collinses refuse to give their daughters traditionally feminine names, because they believe social research shows that women with feminine names are taken less seriously.[2][29] Beginning with their third child, the Collinses have used preimplantation genetic testing during in vitro fertilisation to select embryos with a desirable genetic makeup.[1][16][15] The Collinses claim that every decision they make is backed by data.[29] The Collinses also employ corporal punishment in disciplining their children, which is based on Simone's personal observation of lions and tigers during a safari trip, despite clinical consensus that it impairs childhood development.[29][37][38]

Religious beliefs

In 2024, the Collinses stated they were atheists,[29] and at the time were promulgating a theological worldview they called "Techno-Puritanism" which they described as an "intentionally constructed religion, technically atheist".[29][39] However, by 2025, they stated that "the belief that God is a real entity that actually exists at a different point in time ... is just so core to our worldview".[40] They base Techno-Puritanism on the book The Martyrdom of Man by William Winwood Reade as well as the Bible; they consider both of these works divinely inspired scripture.[39]

Fucking lol