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Ok, Teflon is the only one of those that can wear off over time, and it wears off into your food so consider that.
Stainless steel and cast iron are essentially indestructible and will give you the same performance on day one and 20 years later, if yours are acting different in such a short time frame they're either not stainless steel/cast iron or you're not taking proper care of them.
Stainless steel is almost impossible to ruin, unless you're cleaning them with industrial level sanding equipment I'm going to assume that's not the issue. However stainless steel is tricky to use, you need to preheat over MEDIUM-LOW heat until the pan is UNIFORMLY heated enough that it can levitate a large bead of water all over the surface. Then you need to coat it with some form of fat like cooking oil, and you need to WAIT for the oil to heat properly (just a few seconds, but it's not immediate). The words I capitalized are where I think most people make mistakes, they heat with high heat and so they have some parts that are very hot and others that aren't, then they put oil and immediately add the thing they're trying to cook, if the pan is not evenly hot enough cold spots can cause food to stick.
Cast iron is a different beast, they rely on a thin layer of polimerized oil to become non-stick. While this is resistant enough to survive most things it does wear down over time if you're not taking proper care of it. If your cast iron pan is not as non-stick as it used to be it needs to be seasoned, so do the following:
That should recreate the layer on the pan and make it good as new. You might need to do that periodically, maybe once a year or so depending on how you treat your pans. However after having the initial seasoning you can keep building it over time to avoid having to go through the whole process again. This is done by essentially taking good care of your pan, which means:
If you do that every use it will be good as new indefinitely. If at some point you feel it's sticking or not acting as before you can resason it. Sometimes you might do wrong things like cutting stuff directly on the pan repitedly, or cook tomatoes or acidic food in it (the acid undoes some of the seasoning and leaves a metallic after-taste) which will require you to resason it, but as a general rule just cooking with it should keep increasing the petiquia (name of the coating created by the seasoning process).
Hope this helps, glad to answer anything else. I'm by no means an expert but I do like the few pans I have and like to cook so I've geeked over this for a while.
This pans out
What's the Lemmy equivalent for /r/angryupvote ? Hahahaha
Here's so far the best seasoning method for cast iron that I've found after having tried multiple ones and not having too great of a success. It can't be overstated how important it is to remove all excess oil. It doesn't take much to ruin the results.
This is one of those internet comments that are just a complete and perfect download of lore that should rightfully change thousands of people's lives. It's all there.
What can I say, I love my pans and have geeked out over that for a while.
There is no single skillet surface temp that's right for a stainless pan. Leidenfrost gives you a visual clue as to surface temperature, but that's all it does. It doesn't mean that specific temp is right for any particular cook. Just as an example, you can cook a perfect over easy egg in a stainless skillet, but you cannot do it with a pan that hot.
Sure, that's a generalized explanation but you can use a stainless steel pan in several other ways, for example boiling pasta. But if you want it to be non-stick like OP asked that's the way. And sure, you don't need to rely on the Leidenfrost effect, you can use a surface thermometer or after you've used the same pan enough just your feeling of it, but for a generalized way to tell people how to measure the temperature it's a great marker.
BTW, I make my eggs over easy using that exact same set of steps, so it absolutely can be done. In fact if you don't do that the egg will stick to the pan and you won't be able to flip it, and if you can't flip it it's not over. Also if the pan is not hot enough the yolk will cook, the pan needs to be hot enough to sear it and cook it on the outside without giving time to cook the inside thoroughly.
The more I think about this, the worse that example looks. The steps I outlined are exactly what's needed to make an over easy egg on a stainless steel pan.
It one way, not the way.
Would love to know about other ways