me_irl

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me_irl (lemmy.radio)

submitted 1 week ago by sanitation@lemmy.radio to c/me_irl@lemmy.world

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[–] pedz@lemmy.ca 6 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Yeah. I saw a therapist a decade ago while suicidal and he really helped me. I'm grateful for that. But at one point he started to tell and repeat me what I told him I didn't like others were saying to me, and I was not ready. It pushed me away and I never went back.

Then I looked for another therapist. The second one was okay but it didn't work out. We did a few sessions but I didn't think it was "worth" $125 an hour.

The third one told me it was all my fault during the first session and nearly brought up religion. He was stuck with communities and how I should push myself to fit in one. It lasted exactly one session.

I guess I was lucky to stumble upon a therapist that really helped me even if it couldn't continue. And I guess I am the brick wall anyway.

And as much as I know it's not exactly that clear cut, I feel like therapists are part of the capitalist system to help people cope with it. The first one clearly didn't like it when I said I thought most people had some sort of Stockholm syndrome towards our abusive capitalist society.

It reminds me of a Bad Religion song.

All my scientists are working on a deadline.

So my psychologist is working day and night time

A few years ago I watched a video from a French woman reflecting upon her relationship with her therapist and how much it cost her. She came up with the question: "Am I better off putting €100 on a table, lay on my sofa for an hour, then treat myself with that money, or go to a session with my therapist?" And it stuck with me.

I can't deny therapists and therapy can help, but finding one that works with you, and the price, can be a big obstacle.

[–] Passerby6497@lemmy.world 11 points 1 week ago

She came up with the question: "Am I better off putting €100 on a table, lay on my sofa for an hour, then treat myself with that money, or go to a session with my therapist?" And it stuck with me.

As someone who did that for close to 2 decades after being betrayed by two different therapists, it's not worth it. I didn't have the coping skills to get through a lot of life's problems, and I didn't have the executive function to self-teach something I don't have active interest in (because let's be honest, working through your personality flaws are hard, and overcoming that hurdle is a bitch), so I spent a large amount of time moderately-dissociated but functional.

I started with my therapist last year and he's done (read: helped me to do) more for me in the last year than I was able to do for myself in over a decade.

I think the biggest issues with therapy are time and money. I'm lucky enough to have a flexible wfh job so I can just flip to a telehealth session when it's time, but I could see even just the time commitment being an issue for hourly people / no set schedule / I flexible jobs. Adding on the ridiculous costs associated with it (with 1 session costing 2 days pay at the federal minimum) is just adding insult to injury.