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So a few ideas. Saying agree to disagree is an easy way out if a subject is triggering. They say a broken clock (analog lol) is right twice a day. Even a flat earther could say something that is true in their argument, or even have an interesting idea that might lead somewhere. So while dismissing themmis the easy way out, and it is okay to take the easy way sometimes, it still isn't the best way. And yes, we are all flawed, I have no shortage of flaws myself.
On the topic of justifying. I'm not trying to justify actions. I am trying to say we should expect them and not be surprised by them. We shouldn't assume the person is just completely evil, but that they are too weak to do better, to do what is right, and they have succumb to ancient instincts that are no longer needed, but still exist nonetheless. Humans are mostly driven by chemicals they can't control.
Ass for spain. I agree that if a group manages to hit critical mass, it can for a time operate as under anarchist ideals. But one of the ways it was accomplished in spain was that those who didn't share those ideals could leave. And many of such people were also the ones dieing in the civil war. So it is almost like selecting a group by eliminating those of a certain opinion, and allowing any left to leave if they want. In the end, those of that differing opinion are simply outnumbered. And humans are known to go with the flow. That is why too many put up with dictators they don't believe in. It can work in a small cut out of society. But to do it for the whole of society would require getting rid of a significant amount of the capitalist. Which is why I say, not enough of us have evolved past that drive for power and influence yet, for it to work. And I wish I knew how to speed it up. But progress will slow down when it happens. And thats okay. The overhead of communication and such is just much highed when organized by committee versus a single leader. Ifeally we find a way to elevate leaders who aren't in it for the power and influence. But that is very hard.
It's the best way for me. I'm guessing you don't have experience with PTSD, but if I get into an argument with someone about a topic which is triggering, for the next day or so, I won't be able to sleep, I'll have hallucinations of terrifying things which aren't there, panic attacks that come out of nowhere, cold sweats, flashbacks... I could go on. I don't care if someone might possibly have one good idea amongst all of their bad ones if that is the cost.
Yes, of course, that is absolutely a foundation stone of anarchism: voluntary association. Everyone must always be free to associate, or not, as they see fit.
True capitalists who actually own capital are vanishingly few compared to the working class. They're a rounding error. We do not need to get them on side to succeed. They can go off and do their own thing if they want to, have a real Atlas Shrugged society in a mountain. In reality, they need us, so once there is a critical mass, they will either join our society, or learn to work for themselves, rather than by exploiting others.
If you're talking about self-serving behavior, I understand what you mean, but anarchism is actually completely compatible with self-serving behavior. In fact, one of the major traditions of anarchism, egoist anarchism is entirely centered around that concept.
Finally, the "drive for power and influence" isn't in our nature, but it is rather a response to environmental conditions. Do you see an elephant at the circus and assume that juggling balls must be in an elephant's nature? If we change the system of incentives which govern our society, human behaviors will change and adapt to match.
This can never, ever work. Even if you find people who aren't in it for that, they will almost definitely always be corrupted. Power corrupts. That is one of the founding principles of anarchism.