this post was submitted on 03 Apr 2026
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You're taking it way too literal. Some women think it's romantic when you ask their father for permission to marry them. If she wants you to do this, she'll likely tell you. The same way you'd discuss whether she wants her father to walk her down the aisle. These practices aren't necessarily bad or toxic.
If you are in a healthy committed relationship you talk about these sorts of things, there's no right or wrong. On the other hand, I do agree with you that it would be really weird and creepy to ask a father permission to marry his daughter behind her back.
My partner was going to marry me no matter what their dad said, but it meant a lot to them to get his approval. I was going into the military and he was a retired high ranking lieutenant.
8 years later their dad still loves the shit out of me.
I'm not military, but isn't "high ranking lieutenant" an oxymoron? I thought lieutenants were the very beginning rank for officers.
My bad. I shouldn't type while sick.
Lieutenant colonel is what I meant.