this post was submitted on 31 Mar 2026
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Calm before the storm..
A lot to think about from yesterday (and thank you all for the responses). The links that melba posted yesterday (peoples' experience w/ care giving) were eye opening, was up until 3am reading them.
I think I'm going to withdraw and tone it down a bit.
I will do food and the basics but the meltdowns are going to be largely ignored.
If bro and SIL and bub are coming down this w/e I will not be doing anything extra. I don't even care to ask if they are.
I suppose this is what emotional burn out is. Had it before w/ work but this is a different beast.
I had similar with MIL
refusal to accept assistance, complains, is mean, makes drama, even lies to other people about me
I was always just looking after Miss Seagoon's Nana , no more , now I do nothing, offer nothing, don't even listen
I don't even get angry , it all just goes in one ear and out the other
Hey man. You can only do so much before it becomes a real problem. From the sounds of things, you've gone above and beyond in trying to help.
Other people need to do their part now. I understand how difficult this must be, but stepping back is the right thing to do β₯οΈ
Yeah. I think you have hit burnout. Sorry for feeding into the urge to fix everything by posting recipes and stuff.
I think it really is time for outside help to be brought on board instead of just you (whether they like it or not) because often caregiving does all get demanded from one person and can turn monopolising and even abusive.
Maybe consider a caregiver support group even if you donβt continue at the previous level because caregiver burnout is a different beast. I never had any support or training but having either might have helped me look out for myself and recover better.
Oh please don't be sorry. You have been so very helpful.
I think the urge to fix it for me just needed a reality check. I think I've come to terms that the best I can do is slow cognitive decline and not let the little things get in the way of that. I can't roll this ball back up the hill but I can slow it which you have extremely helpful with.