this post was submitted on 20 Mar 2026
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TankieJerk

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I hope this is the right comm for this (feddit.org)
submitted 15 hours ago by TanteRegenbogen@feddit.org to c/tankiejerk@piefed.social
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[–] bearboiblake@pawb.social 3 points 13 hours ago (1 children)

Thanks for the explanation. Frankly, and this may be TMI, apologies if so, but I'm actually a survivor of sexual abuse as a kid, and personally, the idea of taking legal action against my abuser is nightmare fuel, I absolutely would never do it under any circumstances. The idea of having my trauma exposed, questioned and dragged out over an extended period would be far, far more than I could bear. It would absolutely destroy me worse than the actual abuse ever did.

Besides which, even if I did it, it wouldn't be justice. The way I see it, society holds most of the blame, rather than the actual individual who harmed me. It wasn't just him, but the entire system that puts people into positions of power over kids, the whole authoritarian world, where kids are treated as second class citizens, and not trusted. Most people can never really understand my perspective, so I tend to not talk about it a lot.

Sorry for oversharing, I just felt the need to get that out

[–] chemical_cutthroat@lemmy.world 3 points 13 hours ago (1 children)

I'm right there with you. I was targeted by a neighbor and a stranger. I never told anyone about it. Even now I don't talk about it.

I'm sorry you had to go through it. I'm here to tell you that it's OK if you don't want to do anything about it. Sometimes it's easier to just push it away. You don't have to do anything you don't want to. Live your life how you see fit, and however makes you happiest.

[–] bearboiblake@pawb.social 2 points 13 hours ago

Thanks for sharing that, and for the kind words. Same to you - remember you aren't alone and your feelings, whatever they may be, are totally valid. I've had several years of therapy, which did help a lot, and I'd really recommend it, but yeah... I did actually try to tell adults about it at the time and I wasn't believed and it just fundamentally broke something inside me in a way that feels irreperable. If I share something about it and someone doubts me I immediately go into full blown panic fight/flight mode. It's horrible.

Anyways, thanks for the chat, and much love to you, I wish you all the best <3