Uplifting News
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Psst. It’s exercise and eating well.
Of course, they only help for so long. My dad seemed 45 until he was 70, and it all caught up with him. Now he’s a 75 year old who seems it, but he’s still in better shape than most people his age
Cut to an 80s training montage featuring idiomaddict's 75 year old father trying to eat raw eggs, and chase a bicycle down the street, and run up a large flight of stairs......except again, he's 75. So he tries drinking the eggs, and starts coughing/choking. He's wobbling down the street with one of those rollaiders, and trying to climb some stone steps very slowly.
And despite zero hints or clues to idiomaddict's background, I'm imagining their 75 year old dad as an elderly jewish man. So when he's trying to drink the eggs, he's like "Bah, who drinks eggs like this? Why not scramble them? They'd make a good omlette! It's a waste of eggs to drink like this!"
And when he's chasing the bicycle, very slowly, he's like why are you going so fast? You got places to be? Go on! Live your life! You don't need an old man like me holding me back!" And then idiomaddict walks up like "uh, no, dad. That guy just stole a bike...."
And then as he's going up the white stone stairs, there's a cameo from the school house rock bill. Who's just singing his song in the background.....BUT NOT LOUD ENOUGH TO BE COPYRIGHT STRIKED!!!
I'm very good at this.
It’s not so far off.
Though now that I think about it, I can’t believe I didn’t mention that he stopped drinking and smoking at 26. That’s probably at least as important for the aging process