this post was submitted on 14 Feb 2026
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What dating apps are really optimizing. Hint: it isn’t love (theconversation.com)
submitted 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago) by Beep@lemmus.org to c/technology@lemmy.world
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In the weeks leading up to Valentine’s Day, dating apps typically see a spike in new users and activity. More profiles are created, more messages sent, more swipes logged.

Dating platforms market themselves as modern technological solutions to loneliness, right at your fingertips. And yet, for many people, the day meant to celebrate romantic connection feels lonelier than ever.

This, rather than a personal failure or the reality of modern romance, is the outcome of how dating apps are designed and of the economic logic that governs them.

These digital tools aren’t simply interfaces that facilitate connection. The ease and expansiveness of online dating have commodified social bonds, eroded meaningful interactions and created a type of dating throw-away culture, encouraging a sense of disposability and distorting decision-making.

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[–] vacuumflower@lemmy.sdf.org 10 points 1 day ago (1 children)

because if they serve that official goal, they’re essentially nixing their own customer base.

Not if it's a promiscuous sex dating app. Then it's more of a social network, thought, just around polyfuck graph instead of kitty photos graph.

[–] fonix232@fedia.io 5 points 1 day ago (1 children)

True but we're talking about dating apps meant for the general public, not a hookup/ONS/poly dating app.

[–] Tehdastehdas@piefed.social 1 points 52 minutes ago

Why do you think those should be separate? That just destroys the network effect. Original OkCupid used to have everything. Amazon has everything. Facebook has all sorts of shit. They don't split into niches.