this post was submitted on 13 Feb 2026
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submitted 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago) by ConstructiveVandalism@piefed.zip to c/memes@lemmy.world
 
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[โ€“] MacaqueAndCheese@lemmy.ca 7 points 23 hours ago (3 children)

Twelve years ago my brother's ex girlfriend's wife attended Bottles for Christ where she witnessed a fight between two emerging authors, one was a woman who's name escapes me but the title of her book was "the girl with the dog dick tits". She didn't take kindly to another authors adaptation of the classic "pizza clowns from space hell", claiming it was rubbish and a direct insult to writers. They argued over several bottles of wine until the referees announced the winner was a different author who had written a cookbook about making dinosaur sashimi. Everyone thought it was ridiculous because you would have to figure out time travel in order to even get dinosaur meat, that is until a young descendant of Alberto Weinstein came up with a way to incubate dinosaurs from nothing more than the DNA contained in oil. Unfortunately he died of sepsis before testing out his theory and no one ever got to eat dinosaur sashimi.

Bottles for Christ never happened again after that year, 32 people died of alcohol poisoning and another 210 were hospitalized with severe liver problems. At least those 32 people got to meet their Lord in the end so I guess bottles for Christ wasn't a complete waste of time.

[โ€“] mastertigurius@lemmy.world 5 points 21 hours ago

How the fuck did you get me to read that whole thing? Bravo!

[โ€“] EtherTide@aussie.zone 5 points 22 hours ago (1 children)

Honestly I'm 50/50 on whether this deserves downvotes bc on the one hand, wtf, who asked? On the other, it's c/memes, and this is a MEME

[โ€“] MacaqueAndCheese@lemmy.ca 4 points 21 hours ago

I just don't understand why there were so many authors at something called bottles for Christ. And why were there referees?