this post was submitted on 27 Jan 2026
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Why didn't the Greeks build a wall? Are they stupid?
They did but people kept sneaking in on giant wooden horses
"See! I told you that we could get them to pay for the wall!"
"That's very good sir, but still, what the fuck are we supposed to do with all these giant wooden horses? And isn't it suspicious that they drop off a new one every day?"
"Fake news! We have the most, the biggest and the best giant wooden horses! We'll give them to our giants wooden cowboys to ride! Just yesterday a giant wooden cowboy, the biggest wooden cowboy you have ever seen, came up to me with tears in his eyes, tears just streaming down his wooden face. And he said thank you!. Thank you for the giant wooden horses! Until you we had nothing to ride and had to chase the giant wooden cows around on foot."
They did, actually. To keep the Ottomans out. Didn't work (spoiler).
They also did that with the Persians, though instead of bricks they used Spartans.