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I have had either of these two major symptoms most of my life.
Unhealthy amount: not being able to stop as long as there is alcohol left, staying out til closing, often getting blackout drunk, emptying the glass before going to bed instead of into the sink. This I've had most of my life.
Unhealthy frequency: drinking before or during social events, party every weekend, "unwinding" after work, drinking as a fix to something (like making boring tasks fun or improving my mood or to fall asleep or get energized), thinkig about it a lot, unable to resist whenever its available or offered. This slowly turned into a more and more frequent habit, until I was literally drinking at work.
I guess there is also the final sign:
I relate to number 2. Happily, I quit and it wasnt that hard. My body started to tire of alcohol and my habit soon followed.
Eh. A lot want to quit. They hate needing to drink. However the anxiety (i cant state enough how bad the anxiety is) and over flowing emotions drive them to drink. Therapy with medication is what I'd recommend. Some form of benzodazopine for two to three weeks(sometimes longer in extreme cases) while slowly tapering down. When the body becomes physically dependent on alcohol is when youre in serious truoble because you can quite literally die from withdrawal. Asking for help and getting the resources you need are difficult and easier said than done.