this post was submitted on 18 Jan 2026
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askchapo
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Right, people think dress codes are an actual thing. You can dress traditionally to your culture, but me going outside of it isn't actually breaking anything but other's personal rules for themselves. Oftentimes those rules are ways they shamefully limit themselves.
And institutionally, for example it's not actually inappropriate to go braless and dress in a miniskirt at the work office, HR just doesn't want a sexual harassment lawsuit on their hands and that's why they often try to make workers look sexless as possible. To them lawsuits waste time and money, and capitalizing on a workplace as highly as possible means enforcing a sexless uniform.
And beauty and health institutions capitalize off shame. If I go out with a freely hanging belly I could slow down my path in allowing these industrial standards to run my life. Maybe I should surprise everyone by wearing a crop top eventually.
It reminds me a lot of how queer people sometimes intentionally cross societal norms because it feels liberating to realise that you can just do that, there aren’t actual rules against it.
You can also start experimenting with wearing crop tops in public spaces where it isn’t too weird to have your belly be exposed, like near a beach or pool. Or do short walks outside in croptop to get used to the feeling.