this post was submitted on 10 Jan 2026
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Do you tell your partner where you're taking them when you've made dinner plans?
I booked dinner for my girlfriend's birthday last night and she was asking me his much she should dress up, how far away it is, etc. I felt like I wasn't supposed to tell her but I wanted to just say where because it was a pub nearby, not super out of the way and extravagant but a nice place.
Maybe for the big special occasions you can keep it a surprise but sometimes I just want to say "I booked here, you can look it up and check the menu if you'd like."
I want to be told where I'm going. I don't like surprises. I especially don't like "I have a surprise for you but you have to wait".
This is part of it, I think she wants to keep it a bit of a surprise. So I think it's also about balancing out what she wants from the experience as well
Everyone is different. What's helpful is - we're going to the pub, nice pub, restaurant, nice restaurant etc. What's not helpful is - just look nice, you always look nice anyway, wear whatever.
Those sorts of indicators make sense. Essentially saying what the place is without giving away the name
Personally, I'm not a fan of not being told where we're going, if my partner has booked a place. Unless it was a really fancy restaurant or show and they booked it as a present, I would prefer to be told what the venue is.
I get too anxious when I know something is happening, but not precisely what ๐
That's how i felt about this time. Even though it was for her birthday it wasn't anywhere super fancy. I have a place in mind for valentines day I'd keep as a surprise. For this one I kind of wanted to tell her but I think she wanted it to be a surprise
Unless it's meant to be a big surprise of course.
and dress for the people not the place, is my motto, birthday dinner with sweetheart means dress nice.