I've made it so that when someone deletes their own post it is still viewable, including the comments. The post author and body will NOT be visible. Deleted posts will not show up in communities, search results, etc just as before - you need the URL of the post to get to it. Bookmark a deleted post within 7 days or it will be deleted for real.
Ask your instance admin to upgrade to v1.4.4. Chances are they'll be on 1.4.x already so this will be easy for them.
This is huge. Honestly not knowing if a user deleted his post or it was deleted by mods has been wierd.