Off My Chest
RULES:
I am looking for mods!
1. The "good" part of our community means we are pro-empathy and anti-harassment. However, we don't intend to make this a "safe space" where everyone has to be a saint. Sh*t happens, and life is messy. That's why we get things off our chests.
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3. Frustrated, venting, or angry posts are still welcome.
4. Posts and comments that bait, threaten, or incite harassment are not allowed.
5. If anyone offers mental, medical, or professional advice here, please remember to take it with a grain of salt. Seek out real professionals if needed.
6. Please put NSFW behind NSFW tags.
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I understand… unfortunately, from the other side, I have received so many emails/links/leaflets with woefully out of date information, that I often still try to get direct contact with someone on the inside to confirm stuff.
Lately, I’ve spend an afternoon queuing and getting documents for a government mcGuffin, just to be told at the third meeting with the same staff member that I was an exception and all that stuff did not apply to me at all, I had to go to another office and bring a different set of documents.
I had to directly contact my health insurance three times in one month because the information on their website was out of date.
I had to directly request some “public” documents from HR because the website was last updated early 2024, but there was a law change January 2025.
So many instances like these make me skim emails and often reach out directly. I’m sorry it bites you in the ass.
I also get that some people learn better by hearing things verbally as opposed to seeing/reading information. I don't mind clarification call backs, as in, a person leads the conversation with, "This is what I read, am I understanding it correctly?" It's the calls where it's clear there was no effort to even skim the original communication that make me want to flip my desk.
People often only really absorb the information from the first paragraph of something like an email, so make sure the critical stuff is there.
I have found it helpful to put the TLDR at the top, rather than the bottom of the email. Title that section something like 'Executive Summary' so people subconciously feel more important reading it. Follow with intermediate levels of detail, then the full level of detail, if needed.
It takes a bit more effort to write in this multi stage way, at least until you're used to it, but it means the information you're trying to transmit is more likely to actually get absorbed, which leads to fewer time wasting phone calls or 'as per my last email' mails. If your recipient feels like they've already grasped the basics of the information from the TLDR they're also more likely to read on, whilst actually paying attention. If you need information from them, make sure you list the exact points you need, with once sentence describing each to reduce the cognative load on the recipient.
Of course, none of this works every time, but even saving yourself one call a day can be a massive benefit, both mentally and productively.
I know you're just explaining, not excusing, but if it's literally you're job, then you can put the effort in to read the whole goddamn email.
Whilst I absolutely agree that they should read the whole email, I look at it from the opposite side; I want them to absorb the important information so they don't bother me with trivial or repititious questions, and I know they'll absorb information at the start of my mail with a higher probability than information at the end, so I put the critical stuff at the front and repeat it in more detail later. It's for my sake, rather than to make their job easier, that it also makes their job easier is a bonus.
One of the most effective rules I've ever heard is "make it easy for them to give you what you want". In this case, the poster wants them to stop bothering them with trivial questions, so make the answers easy to digest and they can more easily not bother you. It holds in pretty much any situation when you want something from someone, from asking for a raise to ordering at a resturant. It's proven invaluable advice over the years.
I get it, and I've definitely gotten better at writing emails over the years... It still kind of annoys me though.