I made some off-hand comments on a post on 196 and didn't realize they'd be taken the wrong way. I made a few more comments to help clarify my idea but caught a blanket ban from blahaj.zone with no warning or message.

https://lemmy.world/modlog?page=1&actionType=All&userId=588349

I'm mortified :( It's never been my goal to make others feel bad online. I had a quibble with the wording on a meme and clumsily worded my idea of "Our differences shouldn't be minimized because they make us special" was seen as transphobia/TERF rhetoric.

But with no prior warnings or even a message from a mod to 'cool it', I got banned from the entire instance. I love these communities (feel free to look at my 2.5 years of comment/post history) and I would like to be able to continue to participate.

So, is there a formalized method of ban appeal beyond messaging mods? Their instance has like 12, so I don't want to spam them and have it seen as harassment.

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[–] unknownuserunknownlocation@kbin.earth 5 points 2 days ago (1 children)

Honestly, I've read through his comments, and I'm surprised at how much bad faith is being assumed here.

He never actually defined anything. He essentially said that trans women cannot get pregnant and trans men cannot impregnate someone - at least not naturally (although I am curious to see what science will come up with in the next couple of decades). That's just a fact, unless you have some evidence otherwise.

Yes, of course there are cis people that can't have kids, he never said anything to the opposite effect. Just because there are people with eyes who can't see doesn't mean that the statement "people without eyes can't see" is false.

And OK, people from "terftown" apparently say similar things - honestly, I don't hang out there specifically because I don't like the transphobia, how the hell should I or anyone else who doesn't hang out there know? Can we please just judge people by what they say, and not by what other people say? Because this is turning into a "Hitler also drank water" argument.

[–] curbstickle@anarchist.nexus 0 points 2 days ago (1 children)

Can we please just judge people by what they say

That is precisely what I've done. Just because youre unfamiliar with the rhetoric doesnt mean trans folks aren't, since they've seen these same lines of comments again and again and again.... And again, and again, and again.

For you to say I'm applying bad faith here just tells me you aren't actually reading my comments.

[–] snooggums@piefed.world 4 points 2 days ago (1 children)

You should judge people by what they say without an assumption of 'what they really mean' unless there is more context from them, because they might be oblivious of some other context as well.

Not everyone can keep up with all the dumb shit that transphobes use to imply trans women are not women.

[–] curbstickle@anarchist.nexus 0 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago) (1 children)

You realize they kept expanding on the comment, right? And doubling down on it?

Well intentioned or not isnt really relevant. I'm not calling them a bad person, I pointed out the problem with what they said, and that the wording wasn't relevant.

When it comes to the ban though, it wouldn't matter anyway. They were in violation of both site-wide and community rules.

There is no other context that matters here. They could be trans and it still wouldn't matter. The comment created an arbitrary (and altogether meaningless) distinction on how to define women, specifically separating trans women from women.

A rule violation on both counts.

So what exactly is your point here?

[–] snooggums@piefed.world 4 points 2 days ago (1 children)

So what exactly is your point here?

It looked like you weren't getting the point of what they were saying and was offering another way of saying it. Since your reply is clear that you disagree that context matters, you got the point but disagree.

[–] curbstickle@anarchist.nexus 0 points 2 days ago

Slight correction, I said no other context matters.