this post was submitted on 15 Oct 2025
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United States | News & Politics

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How couples meet in the US (lemmy.ml)
submitted 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) by dessalines@lemmy.ml to c/usa@lemmy.ml
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This is really a monumental societal change.

3rd spaces are nearly completely destroyed, and online seems to be the main option for ppl now.

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[–] folaht@lemmy.ml 5 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

Same here during high school and college.
The issues that I remember were:

  1. Having a great time chatting to women/girls only to find out they were in a relationship.
  2. Going to lively party and there's 50 guys and 10 women of which 9 are girlfriends and the last one is surrounded.
  3. Going to a lively party and noticing a girl/women with an attitude of "Huh, she looks okay, I wonder what she's like. Maybe she's great, maybe she's not, let's find out." So I approach her with "Hi my name is Folaht, what's....?" and immediately get replied "My name is 'Get the hell away from me RIGHT NOW!'" and then walk off with "Sheesh, I just wanted to go to know someone." and hear from behind me "No you don't! You just wanted to GET INTO MY PANTS, WRAGH!!". As poor as replies can be at dating sites, it's at least never this bad.
  4. Going to a lively party and noticing a girl/women with an attitude of "Huh, she looks okay, I wonder what she's like. Maybe she's great, maybe she's not, let's find out." So I approach her with "Hi my name is Folaht, what's....?" and then a group frat guys noticing and going "OOHHHH... WOLF WHISTLE AWOOOO!!!! OW OW OW!!!".

And these issues were not just present, they were the norm.
Every action I did to just start a conversation was "You trying score" by "getting into her pants"
and every opportunity I think I have had, I ran away from because I felt it went way too quick
and I didn't want to say 'yes' to things I might later backtrack and disappoint the person with,
just because I didn't want to hurt that person's feelings at that time.